Blogs for Birthdays

Got a sweet birthday present from www.tjmccormick.tv & www.shaylamccormick.com, so I'll now be blogging from www.sarahbethune.com.

David, Jonathan and the Armor-Bearer

A year ago, if you asked me who in the Bible I wanted to be like...David would have been pretty high up there. Man after God's own heart - not something terrible to strive after, right?

Yeah, then I started getting convicted about it. God totally smoked me when He asked if I would be okay being a Jonathan. He had talents, dreams...all of that self-will and desire marbled his heart that he desired to surrendered to God. He laid it down in order to see God's big picture realized - even if that meant he got a minor role.

So...have been stuck on this idea for the past year, but up until now, missed this verse:

1 Samuel 14:7 (New Living Translation)
<<This is Jonathan's young armor bearer's response to him>>
7 “Do what you think is best,” the armor bearer replied. “I’m with you completely, whatever you decide.”

Isn't that so AWESOME? I love it - for two reasons...
First - It is massively convicting. That response isn't exactly commonplace among most boss/employee relationships, much less with our God who can do no wrong. And how often is our attitude "I'm with you completely, whatever you decide"? So, yes...convicting.

Second - What a crazy illustration of leading by example! Jonathan's heart had to be just so surrendered to God to be the man that he was - the warrior, the next in line to the throne - to not only give that up, but to leverage all that he had to see David successful. Out of that, the armor-bearer just emulated what he witnessed. That gets me excited - love that thought!!

Nothing much to say but this....

I have now been back in the states a month, still seems surreal - I think I normally try to not think about it, but it seems you can only go on for so long that way...

But in the mean time....this is whats on my mind:

1 Peter 5:10 And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.

Isaiah 55:12 You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace;

1 Samuel 14:7 "Do all that you have in mind," his armor-bearer said. "Go ahead; I am with you heart and soul."

Psalm 27:8 My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.” And my heart responds, “Lord, I am coming.”

And this...
I wanna be found faithful
I wanna be found steady
I wanna be found faithful
Until the end

I want to live before Your eyes
I want to stay before Your gaze
Just keep me steady here
Until the end ...

Stuck on this VERSE!!

I am LOVING 1 Peter 5:10!! For anyone "plunged into these hard times" (MSG), it is such an amazing promise! I love how all the different translations communicate the last half of this verse - that He will establish, strengthen, settle, restore, confirm, and place you on a firm foundation!! Isn't that awesome?

1 Peter 5:10 (Amplified Bible)10And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace [Who imparts all blessing and favor], Who has called you to His [own] eternal glory in Christ Jesus, will Himself complete and make you what you ought to be, establish and ground you securely, and strengthen, and settle you.


1 Peter 5:10 (The Message)
He Gets the Last Word 8-11Keep a cool head. Stay alert. The Devil is poised to pounce, and would like nothing better than to catch you napping. Keep your guard up. You're not the only ones plunged into these hard times. It's the same with Christians all over the world. So keep a firm grip on the faith. The suffering won't last forever. It won't be long before this generous God who has great plans for us in Christ—eternal and glorious plans they are!—will have you put together and on your feet for good. He gets the last word; yes, he does.


1 Peter 5:10 (New Living Translation)
10 In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus. So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation.


1 Peter 5:10 (New American Standard Bible)
10After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you.

Streams in the Desert, 11 June

The servant of the Lord must...be gentle. (2 Tim 2:24)

When God finally conquers us and changes our unyielding nature, we receive deep insights into the Spirit of Jesus. Then, as never before, we see His extraordinary gentleness of spirit at work in this dark and unheavenly world. Yet the gifts of "the fruit of the Spirit" (Gal 5:22) do not automatically become evident in our lives. If we are not discerning enough to recognize their availability to us, to desire them and then to nourish them in our thoughts, they will never become embedded in our nature of behavior. Every further step of spiritual growth in God's grace must be preceded by acknowledging our lack of a godly attribute and then by exhibiting a prayerful determination to obtain it.

However, very few Christians are willing to endure the suffering through which complete gentleness is obtained. We must die to ourselves before we are turned into gentleness, and our crucifixion involves suffering. It will mean experiencing genuine brokenness and a crushing of self, which will be used to afflict the heart and conquer the mind.

Today many people are attempting to use their mental capacity and logical thinking to obtain sanctification, yet this is nothing but religious fabrication. They believe that if they just mentally put themselves on the altar and believe that altar provides the gift of sanctification, they can then logically conclude they are fully sanctifies. Then they go happily on their way, expressing their flippant, theological babble about the "deep" things of God.

Yet the heartstrings of their old nature have not been broken, and their unyielding character, which they inherited from Adam, has not been ground to powder. Their soul has not throbbed with the lonely, gushing groans of Gethsemane. Having no scars from their death on Calvary, they will exhibit nothing of the soft, sweet, gentle, restful, victorious, overflowing, and triumphant life that flows like a spring morning from an empty tomb.

Saving the World...one Red Bull at a Time...

One lesson that has been so central to my time here is that it's about the one. I cannot feed, clothe, educate, provide shelter, or disciple every child - but I can do it to one. I think we often look at the big picture and realize the need is so great and allow that to paralyze us from doing anything at all.

God reminded me of this in a much more trivial way a couple of weeks ago. We had all the teams from the US in for the conference and during one of our morning meetings, it was really apparent how jet-lagged and worn out everyone was. I overheard one of the guys behind me say he just wished he had a Red Bull. Earlier that morning, I stuck the one my friend had gotten me in my purse, thinking I might need it later. But after I heard him say that, I pulled out my Red Bull and handed it back to him. Simple way to meet one 'need'. Sure, I didn't have enough to give to everyone, but I could help someone.

I pray that the church can get a hold of that - because if we can each help one orphan, one widow, one pastor, one spouse, one stranger - we can change the world.

Thank You Notes

A couple of months ago, the youth at HPC had a lock-in during a school break. Thanks to all my donors, I was able to pay for some kids that otherwise, wouldn't have been able to afford to go. Two of the boys wrote me a thank you card after, and because of your generosity enabled them to go, I wanted to share what they had to say:

"Thank you Sarah for being so kind to us. We had no option to is going to pay for us to the lock-in. Thank you very much Bethune may the Lord bless you!!"

and the second one said...

"Thank you Sarah for paying for us in the lock in. may the Lord bless every were you go and anywhere you are. that is why is so nice to be a Christian because God does anything at the time he fill like thank! thank!"

The lock-in was not only an awesome time to just hang out with the youth, but a great opportunity to pour into their lives and encourage them in their walk with the Lord. So, thank you for providing that opportunity to these youth!

James 5

James 5:7-8 (Amplified Bible)
7So be patient, brethren, [as you wait] till the coming of the Lord. See how the farmer waits expectantly for the precious harvest from the land. [See how] he keeps up his patient [vigil] over it until it receives the early and late rains.
8So you also must be patient. Establish your hearts [strengthen and confirm them in the final certainty], for the coming of the Lord is very near.

...loving that...Establish your hearts!!

Go Global Southern African Leaders Conf.

Hello All!

Just a quick note to let you all know what's up. This week is so awesome, in that I am wrapping up a project that will have lasted 7 months start to finish. Healing Place Church Swaziland is hosting the first Go Global Southern African Leaders Conf., for pastors throughout Southern Africa - (think of it as an African ARC conf.) this week.

We are hosting almost 100 Americans (from Healing Place Church, The Life Church, and Celebration Church JAX) to help make this happen - they have been AMAZING - such a blessing.

Tuesday is our last prep day, with the conference on Wed/Thurs, and a huge youth event on Friday and more next gen. training on Saturday.

It has been months and months of conference calls, spreadsheets, and all-nighters prepping for this- but it is all SO WORTH IT! We still have much to do before the conf, so be praying the exhaustion doesn't sink in until after church on Sunday :)

To Be Cont...

Life as missionary in Swaziland

My friends, Missy & Jessie, came up with this list...gives you a much better idea of what life is like here :)

*Being proposed to at least once a day by a Swazi man
*While making lunch, a family of monkey’s pass by on your upper porch
*A missionary’s bed time is usually 8pm, with wake up being 5:30 am
*No phone call is longer than 30 sec
*The over whelming joy you experience when you actually find a can or sour cream in the local Spar
*Amazing headlines you read while driving to the 'Cup office every morning
*Going to a carepoint and at least one child will always touch your hair and be in complete Awe *Everyday is the Kingdom’s National Pee-On-The-Side-Of-The-Road-Day!
*Hazard lights are a whole new meaning
*It’s common to walk out of Spar with the security guy wearing full SWAT gear and an AK-47 chillen in his right hand
*You see hip high Swazi man thigh in authentic attire
*When you feel obligated to know and greet every white person you pass
*A white girl driving a Kombie with “Bling-Bling” written on the back door is national news
*Your entire lawn is cut by a weed wacker
*Driving into on coming traffic is not unusual
*Sunday lunch out at a restaurant takes 4 hours to get….I will never complain when I get back to the states, haha.
*KFC is a treat
*To be honored with the only drive-through in Swaziland
*You get excited when its raining and the internet is STILL working ☺
*Poka-Dot shirts and Plaid pants are fashionable
*The 3rd season of “The Office” is the highlight of your week!
*The phrase, “There is starving kids in Africa” isn’t funny anymore when you know them all by name
*The highest ticket you can get by the Police is 60R= $6 US.. and American’s get the “American Discount” of 70R ;)
*“I date missionaries for their money” is a great joke for a missionary girl, ha. And Jessy wants to make a shirt for it.
*It takes at least 4 Keys to get into your house…Skeleton Keys just make the process more awesome…
*Playing pranks on people is no longer looked at upon as being childish
*..Everything is the same but different
*The pepper spray brigade is unleashed when Jessy and I walk out of the Cup Office alone at night to lock up and run to our car….P.S. Don’t tell our parents ;) Taking a jog requires a can of pepper spray and a walking buddy any hour of the day
*“Eish” and “How” become a part of your vocab for shocked describing words
*Waiting for cows to cross the highway and roads is a daily occurrence
*Geographically, Swaziland is known to missionaries by carepoint location to find places

TIA!

412 Lock-In @ Execution Rock

Swazi's Funeral from a White Girl's Eyes

Yes, funerals are horribly sad - not negating that fact...but, being a white girl at a funeral in rural Swaziland makes for an interesting experience - over and beyond that fact that it was my first funeral in a different culture....

*The whole experience lasts a LONG time...prayer vigil at night, until they arrive at the burial site (which usually involves a hike) at dawn. For the funeral I went to, we met up at 3am to drive to the burial site. They say this way, the funeral won't interfere with work, church, etc. (Side note: whenever I die, have my funeral at a normal time...if you can't make it because of work, no sweat, I won't care...just don't have people get up at 3am...)

*When we arrived at the funeral (I was with about 5 Swazis), the singing, praying, crying pretty much stopped - instead, they all pretty much stared at me. One of the ladies in charge promptly said to Roger, "We noticed you came in the bus with her. Do you think she would like to say something?" Talk about being put on the spot…

*Crazy spiritual stuff happening. First thing I saw when I stepped out of the kombi was a group of possessed guys - you better believe I was pleading the blood of Jesus while I was there. The Jericho’s and Zionist were also there - good reminder of why I'm here...

*The immediate family of the deceased is responsible for the feeding everyone after. Yep...in the midst of grieving and planning for the services, you also have to cook for 70 - 100+ people.

*At the end, I ended with some sort of awkward receiving line. Umm...forget the grieving family...lets meet/hug/greet the white person that showed up. Little weird.

In the end, a funeral is a funeral. Break your heart and give you a huge opportunity to be Christ’s hands and feet.

Death

Wish I didn't have so much to say about this subject...

Even in the past month, I have become much more familiar with what - for a Swazi - is simply just part of life.

Remember Musa? His mom had also had another child - a baby. It's who she lived for, especiallyafter Musa passed. Her other baby died Saturday night. What do you tell someone after that? I have no idea...I mean, I prayed for her on Sunday - but even still, every word that came out of my mouth seemed so empty. I know it's not - there is LIFE in the Word...but, my life is so different -- my culture isn't defined by death. I am so thankful that she is a part of Healing Place Church - that she is also a part of an eternal culture - where there is no death...no goodbyes...no sorrow...but until we are there, please be praying for her.

I recently had to opportunity to attend the funeral of one of our youth's mom. It was an honor to be able to go and support him at that time. I have to say, Nhlanhla is amazing! Seriously embodies the JOY of the Lord more than anyone I know!! It ripped my heart out to see him so broken. I have definitely been praying that the Lord would restore that joy - and He has. He is so faithful.

SERVOLUTION Update

Hey all:

Check out http://hpcswazi.com/ for the lastest updates of what HPC is doing thoughout Swaziland during 7 Days of Servolution!!!

We just got back from Mbabane Gov't Hospital and it was AWESOME!!!! God moved BIG - TIME!!! It was so cool!

So, keep checking back for the latest Servolution news!

The Decade of Experimentation

Just read this on Mark Batterson's blog today...got me thinking....thought I'd share:

Not sure why I'm sharing this. But here goes. Hope it inspires someone who is trying to figure out what they want to be when they grow up. That includes me by the way!In 1952, Albert Schweitzer won the Nobel Peace Prize for his humanitarian efforts in equatorial Africa. But let share his back story. He woke up on a summer morning in 1896 and said, "While outside the birds sang I came to the conclusion that until I was thirty I could consider myself justified in devoting myself to scholarship and the arts, but after that I would devote myself directly to serving humanity."What a fascinating perspective on his twenties! He felt justified in devoting them to scholarship and the arts. Here's my thought: what if we viewed our twenties as a decade of experimentation? That concept comes from serving a congregation that is 67% single twenty-somethings so I know how stressed out twenty-somethings can get over their career path. I think twenty-somethings feel way too much pressure to find the perfect career yesterday and advance as far up the ladder as fast as possible. Can I push back a little? What if you approached opportunities as experiments? What if you tried your hand at different things. Don't worry about your career path! Focus on your spiritual path. Build a resume of spirit-led adventures that may or may not further your career or education. But they will further the kingdom of God.Now fast-forward eight years. Albert Schweitzer said, “One morning in the autumn of 1904, I found on my writing table in the seminary one of the green-covered magazines in which the Paris Missionary Society reported its activities. A Miss Scherdlin used to pass them on to me. Without paying much attention, I leafed through the magazine that had been put on my table the night before. As I was about to turn to my studies I noticed an article with the headline, "The Needs of the Congo Mission." Schweitzer said, "I finished my article and quietly began my work. My search was over."Can I share some good news with those of you who haven't found your God-ordained passion or big hairy audacious goal or one God idea or life mission? Here it is: God wants you to get where God wants you to go more than you want to get where God wants you to go. So that takes the pressure off of us. By the way, that singular thought is really the heart of Wild Goose Chase.Part of the reason I love that story about Albert Schweitzer so much is because I discovered the parachurch ministry we came to DC to direct via a magazine ad, not unlike Schweitzer. That ad led to a phone call. A phone call led to a trip. And a trip led to a move. And that move put us in a position to pastor National Community Church.One final thought. It is Albert Schweitzer who once observed: "The tragedy of life is what dies inside a man while he lives."

SERVOLUTION

I know a lot of churches back home are participating in Servolution (...creating a revolution through serving...) throughout their communities leading up to Easter Sunday. So happy to say that HPC Swaziland, HPC Maputo (in Mozambique), and Celebration Church Bulawayo (in Zimbabwe) are all participating in Servolution.

Here is a list of what we are doing in our communities...be praying that we can show love in a real and relevant way!

Friday: Youth Rally at Mpolonjeni High School (partnering with an AMAZING church in that community!!)

Saturday: Outreaches throughout the community of Mangwaneni Mbabane...cleaning homesteads, repairing mud/stick houses.

and

The children will be headed to SOS Children's Village to go love on some orphans and pick up garbage.

Sunday: Instead of having a traditional service, we will all meet and head over to the Bus Rank to do some major cleaning and painting...this is one of the more shady places in Mbabane, but a huge opportunity to show Christ in a practical place for so many in the community.

Monday: Providing lunch to all the workers in our office complex

Tuesday: Providing lunch to all the station attendants at various petrol stations and be offering free windscreen washing.

Wednesday: The youth will be holding outreaches at their individual high schools and the church will be visiting Mbabane Government Hospital, visiting patients and handing out hygiene packets.

Thursday: Providing lunches to local bank employees and workers at the Golden Mile.

Please also be praying for the church staff and interns...we are all a bit tired heading into this crazy Easter season and would appreciate your prayers very much!

Swaziland Billboards

I was pretty pumped about this...so I thought I would (finally) blog about it...

First off, you should know that Swaziland has some pretty crazy billboards...condom ads, some promoting circumcision, etc...

There was one in particular that I would always pass on the way home...one about always being protected with this picture of this young guy and girl holding a condom. But, last week it fell down (it had been there over a year...it was time!)

Today, they were putting a new billboard in its place and I was so excited when I read it. It said: I am a one women man! Yay Swaziland! It might seem insignificant, but I was really excited :)

In a culture that still practices polygamy and doesn't seem to give sleeping around a second thought, any sort of encouragement in the other direction is AWESOME!

Bald Men and Malaria

"Malaria is spread by mosquitoes," Bill Gates said while opening a jar of mosquitoes at a conference this past week. "I brought some. Here, I'll let them roam around. There is no reason only poor people should be infected." Now that is an eye opening demonstration! Gates waited a minute or so before assuring the audience the liberated insects were malaria-free. But what a powerful point! He went on to say that "There is more money put into baldness drugs than into malaria, now, baldness is a terrible thing and rich men are afflicted. That is why that priority has been set." I love that he calls it out! Some times it takes someone with power to open the eyes of his peers!

Never Gets Old

We had a Baptism service this past Sunday at HPC. What struck me is how many of them were youth! Praise God!

Stand up, stand out and CHANGE THE WORLD!

One of our HPC interns, Tye, sharing what Christ has done in his life.

Lunch on Tuesdays

I just finished leading morning Bible study with our HPC interns and am looking forward to spending some time with some of my favorite people - Waterford Kamhlaba students - later today for lunch.

I LOVE these students! They are an amazing group of world changers who understand they can truly impact the world in which we live. They are incredibly bright - with dreams to be the first Kenyan in space or an attorney working in international human rights - and are totally dedicated to see their dreams come true.

So, I get the opportunity to hang out with them for lunch every Tuesday. It is such an important time to be able to pour into those relationships to be able to build that trust and respect in order to speak into their lives.

These kids will be successful in whatever they do - pray with me that it is for HIS glory, HIS renown.

Lizette, Jonathan, Isaac, Trevor, Vanessa, Kevin, Vivian, and Sepati at 412 (the Youth Group at HPC) a few weeks ago.

What I am Reading...

Since I am obviously not spending a large amount of my time blogging...then what am I doing you ask...

Reading. Here is what I just finished, just started, or find myself somewhere in between:

Tribes by Seth Godin
Crazy Love by Francis Chan
Communicating for a Change by Andy Stanley
Under Cover by John Bevere
Who You Are When No One's Looking by Bill Hybels
The Trouble with Africa: Why Foreign Aid Isn't Working by Robert Calderisi

All stretching me - enjoying them all. If you have any suggestions for my next book, let me know!

On My Mind

Lord Your Name is higher than the heavens
Lord Your Name is higher than all created things
Higher than hope
Higher than dreams
The Name of the Lord

I will seek Your face
Call upon your name, Jesus
All I want is You, Jesus

Musa

Yes, I realize I am a blog-slacker.
I apologize.

I have a lot to say...a lot going on...plenty of experiences to share with you, but I think I will start with this...

Baby Musa.
Musa died on Thursday. He was this precious little boy...my buddy I would visit with every Sunday at church...I carried him around during the Mbabane Christmas Party.

I saw him two Sunday's ago. He seemed quiet...so I moved on, greeted some other visitors sitting around his mom. Then Friday before youth, his mom came by to tell us that Musa got sick and she took him to the hospital, where he died on Thursday.

This is the first time I knew a child this young that died. And my mind doesn't know how to resolve it. It doesn't make sense. What was his life for? To be born positive...get TB...and die within a couple of years? I don't get it...It doesn't make sense to me.

And like the majority of people who lose someone, no matter how close, there is always that regret...I wish I spent more time with them...made sure they knew I loved them/cared about them.

I didn't do that.

You need to watch this

Christmas Party Video

Check out this video of the Christmas Parties that one of our interns made. Enjoy!

Driving this Morning

We have a major highway that they were working on here in Swaziland...they had started construction right after I got here, so I never expected them to be done by the end of my term here (...seeing how the construction projects I saw in Oct 2007 seem to have made little or no progress).

So, imagine my excitement when I was driving down the Malegwane this morning and all lanes were open! Well...at least until I saw all the signs saying "Warning: No Painted Lines". I was thinking, you would never see this in America, but it can't be that bad. Wrong! It was like a stinkin' racetrack. All these kombis (mini-buses) flying down the mountain, weaving in and out of traffic. Suddenly, the road, which is supposed to be two lanes, became five.

Yeah...I don't think they thought through that very well.

Christmas Parties

We had our Christmas party for our Manzini CarePoints this past Saturday. It was incredible; I have never seen so many children in one place! Sunday, Healing Place Church Swaziland joined with a sister church and helped us with our Christmas party for the CarePoints around Maphiveni. It was such an honor to actually be there this year...and I had a blast being rubbish collector, ballon animal maker, face painter, lunch tent director, and (my favorite!) slip 'n slide duty...which, of couse, Zinty and I personally made sure it was safe for the kids to go down first.

The coolest part for me was when the kids were getting on the bus to go and they would give you a big hug, smile, and say "Thank You" and you knew how much they meant it. For me, that's when I felt like we were really Jesus to them...we made them feel loved, valued...and know we had a special day just for them to know that they have a Saviour who is passionate about them and came to earth for each one of them.

The kids at the Manzini Christmas Party...

Some of our AMAZING volunteers from HPC....

Christy and I...

Achieving

Being here has given me the chance to think...a lot. I have realized how much I like...well, love to achieve. I love to prove that I can do it (whatever 'it' may be for that moment...day...season). Prove that I can exceed expectation, that I can do it faster, better, more thought-out than anyone else.

Of course, taking initiative is a wonderful thing and that drive to achieve can be a huge blessing. Problems arise when you and God have different items on the list of things to achieve. Sometimes I feel like I have been going a million miles an hour, only to arrive in Swaziland and feel like I ran into a brick wall and am still shell-shocked from the impact. I can't achieve the same things here...God isn't letting me pursue things that were on my list...I'm the one still learning this new environment. I feel like I have lost my ability to achieve...to be self-reliant...to prove myself to me and others. Now, anything I can achieve in my own strength isn't worth noticing.
Then, this morning, my devotion had this verse:

Our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. (2 Cor 4:17)

Yep, there's my word! This refining process is achieving something far greater than I could ever achieve in my own agenda. It's achieving something in me...molding me to look a little more Christ-like.

There is a peace that springs soon after sorrow,
Of hope surrendered, not of hope fulfilled;
A peace that does not look upon tomorrow,
But calmly on the storm that it has stilled.

A peace that lives not now in joy's excesses,
Nor in the happy life of love secure;
But in the unerring strength the heart possesses,
Of conflicts won while learning to endure.

A peace there is, in sacrifice secluded,
A life subdued, from will and passion free;
It's not the peace that over Eden brooded,
But that which triumphed in Gethsemane.

All in

Officially that time again...the time to start figuring out what on earth I am doing...where am I headed. And that scares me to death. But that is about my heart...whether I am all in or not.
This time last year was easy...I knew what He was calling me to do. Yes, I had things I had to choose to sacrifice, but I knew the answer, an answer to a question I wasn't even planning on asking. But I have no idea where He is really beckoning. Last year, not choosing to answer the call was even an option - I could have ignored God and just stayed put...I can't do that. I have to choose - Florida...the States...Swaziland...other African countries. I think I am scared of the answer...scared of what He might call me to.
Pray with me. Please. Pray that as I battle self, what I want in my life verses what He has ordained. Pray that He would speak. Pray that I hear Him clearly. Pray that I would walk in what He has for me.
Ahh...He is so faithful. So, so faithful. He knows where I am headed - what I need to get there. How to sustain me there.
God, I'm all in. Whatever it is, whatever you ask - I'm Your girl; I'm going to obey. Surely He will prove Himself faithful.

Are You Ok With This?

...Okay, I know I am starting to just re-post what other people post, but this was really good! This is from Mark Batterson, pastor of Theater Church in DC and author of "In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day" and "Wild Goose Chase" (both excellent books, the former being a must read).

I spent my morning at the Civil Forum on Global Health sponsored by Rick Warren and Saddleback Church. Thought I'd share a few reflections.

The focus on the forum, in my estimation, was how we as churches can leverage our God-given resources and use them to fight what Rick Warren calls the five global Goliaths--spiritual emptiness, self-serving leadership, extreme poverty, pandemic diseases, and rampant illiteracy. Those five issues are the focus of Saddleback's Peace Plan.

I'm not sure I can do this justice, but Rick shared three slides that made a profound point. The slides showed the western province of Rwanda, population 700,000. The first slide showed the locations of all hospitals. There are only 3 of them. The second slide showed the location of all the health clinics. There are 22 of them. And the third slide showed the location of all the churches in Rwanda. There are 728 of them. Then Rick made a simple observation: The church is the largest organization on earth. What if we viewed churches, especially in less-developed countries, as distribution channels for things like education and health care? The church already has the infrastructure. The church already has the workforce. The church already has the motivation. We just need to strategically mobilize to make a difference.

On a personal note, this event was timed so it coincided with World AIDS Day. We watched a video and one of the statistics was pretty alarming. 8000 people will die from AIDS today. And as you may know, its the #1 killer in Africa. And the video posed this question: are you ok with this?

Most of us are ok with that. And we're ok with it because it's just an issue without a name or a face. We've never held someone who is starving to death. No one in our family has needlessly died from contaminated water. We don't know anybody who has been kidnapped and sold into slavery. But once the issue has a name and a face it changes everything doesn't it? God knows each of those names and faces and that is why it breaks His heart.

I can't get that question out of my spirit: are you ok with this?

Good Word

A good word from Spurgeon this morning:

Our business is neither to ask nor answer foolish questions, but toavoid them altogether; and if we observe the apostle’s precept (Titus3:8) to be careful to maintain good works, we shall find ourselves fartoo much occupied with profitable business to take much interest inunworthy, contentious, and needless strivings.

He Knows What We Need

I am learning that God knows what I need a lot more than I do…and He has been so faithful in reminding me of that…down to day after day of devotions that seem written specifically for me. Take today’s as an example:

You have shown your people desperate times (Ps. 60:3)

I have always been glad that the psalmist said to God that certain times of life are desperate or difficult. Make no mistake about it, there are difficult things in life.

This summer someone gave me some beautiful pick flowers, and as I took them, I asked, “What kind are they?” My friend answered, “They are rock flowers. They grow and bloom only on rocks where you can see no soil.” Then I thought of God’s flowers growing in desperate times and hard places, and I somehow feel that He may have a certain tenderness for His “rock flowers” that He may not have for His lilies and roses.

The trials of life are sent to make us, not break us….And a direct blow to the outer person may be the greatest blessing possible to the inner person. SO if God places or allows anything difficult in our lives, we can be sure that the real danger or trouble will be what we will lose if we run or rebel against it.

Heroes are forged on anvils hot with pain,
And splendid courage comes but with the test.
Some natures ripen and some natures bloom

Only on blood-wet soil, some souls prove great
Only in moments dark with death or doom.

God finds His best soldiers on the mountain of affliction.

(From Streams in the Desert…and thanks to TJ who sent it to me!)

My Dad and His Friends

I am a lot like my Dad…and attribute many of my personality traits to him, including my loner tendencies (with him being much more of a solitary person than I). So, you can imagine my shock when right after I move here, every time we talk, he would tell me all about his new friends, how they were doing and when he saw them last.

It seemed that my dad was all too curious as to what Ps. Charles did every other Saturday morning, so he went go see for himself – and after that, he was hooked. Now he and my mom faithfully serve homeless breakfast on Saturday mornings. All I can say is that I am so proud that I have parents that care more about the lonely and forgotten more than their comfort zones, that they care about what Jesus cares about…that they desire to be His hands and feet…

…Love y’all; have fun this Saturday!

Got Sick…

I woke up on my birthday with a bit of an earache, but it was the day the Bayside team was arriving, so I didn’t have the time to deal with it…since then, it has bothered me off and on until last Tuesday when the occasional dull pain turned into a more constant throbbing.

So I went to the Mbabane Clinic (a private hospital here) and the doctor gave me some eardrops…all for under $20USD, so I thought I was good to go, right? Not so much. By Saturday, I had a constant headache..didn’t sleep well the night before…the whole side of my face was sore…couldn’t hear out of it…so by Sunday, when I thought I would punch the next person that came near my ear, if I didn’t vomit from pain first, I figured it would be a good idea to go back to the doctor Monday.

Let me just say, you might not think you sleep a lot, but when you can’t sleep at all, one night seems like a very, very long time. I have a pretty high pain tolerance, but this was getting ridiculous. I mean, it’s just an ear, for Pete’s sake, but I have never had anything hurt so badly.

The doctor hooked me up with some antibiotics, throat lozenges, and praise God – pain killers (the Tylenol stopped working a long time ago…) AND he didn’t charge me because I had to come back before my scheduled follow-up visit (see Mom, I was listening about making the follow-up appt.). I already feel so much better and trust that I will be back to normal in no time.

What all this really means is that y’all should pray I find a nurse practitioner, physician’s assistant, or MD to marry, because I am not used to not having my health care provider not live under the same roof as I do. Or you could just pray that my ‘rents make it out to the mission field, if you prefer.

This breaks my heart....Pray for Zim

S Africa to cut aid to Zimbabwe

South Africa's cabinet says it will withhold $28m of agricultural aid to neighbouring Zimbabwe until a representative government is in place.
South Africa's cabinet said the impasse was creating a humanitarian crisis.
The current outbreak of cholera was a clear indication that Zimbabweans were becoming "victims of their leaders' lack of political will", it said.
The US ambassador to Zimbabwe has said that 294 people have died from the cholera outbreak.
Ambassador James McGee also said that President Robert Mugabe's grip on power "may be actually stronger than it was this time last year.
"Mugabe continues to hang on to power through the political patronage system," he said.
The South African cabinet's strongly worded statement said:
"No amount of political disagreement can ever justify the suffering that ordinary Zimbabweans are being subjected to at the moment."
Correspondents say this is the first indication that South Africa is taking a tougher stance on Zimbabwe.
Food shortages, a lack of seed and fertiliser for planting and the breakdown in health services are all having a serious effect on the people Former UN head Kofi Annan
Former South Africa President Thabo Mbeki, who negotiated September's power-sharing agreement between the ruling Zanu-PF and opposition Movement for Democratic Change (MDC), was an advocate of quiet diplomacy.
But two months later, several rounds of talks on allocating ministerial posts have failed and aid groups say Zimbabwe is facing a major humanitarian crisis.
They expect that more than five million people, or nearly half the population, will need food aid by early next year.
The economy is in freefall, with inflation last listed in July, at 231,000,000%.
The health services are in a state of collapse, exacerbating the effects of the cholera outbreak, which the BBC's Peter Biles in Johannesburg says appears to have spread to South Africa.
Three people are reported to have died in the town of Musina close to the border with Zimbabwe and more than 70 people there are receiving treatment, he says.
Elders to visit
The South African cabinet statement also said it would send assistance to help Zimbabwe deal with the cholera outbreak.
The agricultural aid will be dispersed in time for the April 2009 planting season, it said.
Meanwhile, Zimbabwe's state-owned Herald newspaper reports that more talks will be held on forming a power-sharing government next week between Zanu-PF and the MDC in South Africa.
Zimbabwe's government has denied a report that it was blocking a visit from former UN head Kofi Annan, former US President Jimmy Carter and human rights activist Nelson Mandela's wife Graca Machel.
The three international figures are part of a group called the Elders, set up to tackle world conflicts.
In a statement, the Elders said they would visit the region on Friday "to make a first hand assessment of the humanitarian situation in Zimbabwe".
"The purpose of our visit is to meet those working on the ground to better assess the extent of the crisis and how assistance can be improved," Mr Annan said.
"Food shortages, a lack of seed and fertiliser for planting and the breakdown in health services are all having a serious effect on the people.
"We understand that the situation requires an urgent response and that delays will only prolong the people's suffering."
The Herald, seen as a mouthpiece for President Robert Mugabe's Zanu-PF party, had reported a government official as saying the planned mission was biased.
Mr Annan said they had no intention of becoming involved in the ongoing political negotiations.
The power-sharing deadlock follows disputed presidential elections earlier this year.
Mr Tsvangirai won the first round in March, but not by enough to secure outright victory.
He then pulled out of a run-off in June, citing a campaign of violence against his supporters.
Story from BBC NEWS:http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/2/hi/africa/7739903.stmPublished: 2008/11/20 19:03:13 GMT© BBC MMVIII

I'm Tired

Just being honest here and letting you know I’m tired...just kind of over it all. Emotions can be so lame…if you don’t believe me, read below:

…I am tired of saying goodbye to people in the states and trying so hard to keep those relationships up
…I am tired of new additions to my family here, people that are so precious to me, leaving
…I am tired of waiting
…I am tired of trusting
…I am tired of stupid situations that won’t seem to resolve
…I am tired of not feeling settled in my job
…I am tired of always feeling like there are big decisions to make

Agggggghhhhh! Yeah, I am just tired.

***So, I wrote this last night and already feel so much better. But, just keep praying for me, God is faithful.

Pursuit

I got this from the Catalyst website. It resonated with me, so I thought I’d share…

Pursuit
By Matt Chandler

I spend a good portion of my week in dialogue with pastors. They are from different denominations and tend to be different ages (although most of them are young). The conversations range from theology to philosophy, from church growth to how to lead a staff. I enjoy them. I love robust discussion over things that matter. I like it when the unanswerable questions are asked and wrestled over; it somehow feeds my soul. Lately, though, I have been somewhat disturbed by something I am hearing or maybe sensing in the questions and directions of the conversations in which I find myself.
When I exited itinerant ministry to become a pastor, I left crowds that were in the thousands and finances that more than provided for my family - to go to a small (160 people) church that cut my annual salary in half. There wasn't one person who thought that taking the position at The Village was a "smart" move. In fact, several actually sat me down and told me they thought I was being disobedient and a bad steward of the gifts that God had imparted to me. The truth is I didn't become the pastor of a church in the suburbs of Dallas because I had a grand vision for growing a dynamic, life-transforming, church-planting, Gospel-preaching, God-centered church. I took the position because after a great deal of conversations, prayers and fasting, my wife and I felt it was the direction God, through the Holy Spirit, was leading us. I came to The Village because I thought that by doing so I would get to see more of Him, experience more of Him, sense more of Him, see more of me die, more of my flesh perish, the old man in me lose more power...He is the great end that I am after. He is why.
In 1 Timothy 4:10 Paul writes "For to this end we toil and strive, because we have our hope set on the living God, who is the Savior of all people, especially of those who believe." I love that verse. We toil, yes. We strive, yes, but where is our hope? What, or rather, who is the goal? I love preaching the Gospel and I love planting churches, but I do those things because in them there is this unbearable weight of His presence. This crushing majesty that makes me want to cry, sing and scream all at the same time.
The thing that disturbs me lately is that it seems we've made the goal something else all together. We think the goal is growing our churches to a certain size or our platforms (pulpits, blogs, books) to a certain fame. How hollow is that? And, how dangerous? Just because men love Jesus and follow Him doesn't mean that they get to grow a platform or reach a certain level of "success" (I use that word loosely). Here are a few men who loved our great God and King and were obedient beyond the norm:
* Moses spends his whole life with grumbling, whiners and dies without getting to walk into the promise land.
* Samson suicide bombs the Philistines and when the dust settles he is dead and the Philistines still rule over Israel.
* David's son rapes his sister and leads a rebellion against David, dethroning him for a season.
* Jeremiah ends up in exile with the rest of the country after repeatedly getting beaten for preaching what God commanded him to preach.
* John the Baptist is beheaded by a pervert who gives his head to a 15-year-old stripper.
* Peter is killed, reportedly crucified upside down.
* Paul is killed in Rome but only after he spends his life (with thorn intact) being beaten, rejected, lost at sea, and consistently dealing with people coming in behind him and destroying what he built.
If your hope is set on anything other than Him, how do you survive when it goes bad? How do you remain passionate and vibrant when no one comes or the baptismal waters are still for long stretches? How do you maintain doctrinal integrity or teach hard things if He isn't the treasure? How do you worship when your wife gets sick or your son goes for a ride in an ambulance? If He is the goal, the treasure, the pursuit, then those things are fuel that presses you into His goodness and grace all that much more. I am not saying they are pleasant or enjoyable but only that if He is your goal you will find your faith sustained.
May God bless you and keep you. May you see that He is the treasure, He is the pursuit, He is the goal...and may you press on toward the goal for the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.
Matt Chandler is the Lead Pastor of The Village Church in Highland Village, TX. You can read more of his thoughts at his blog: DwellDeep.net.

DC vs. the DRC

God reminded me of something last week. It wasn’t one of those things where He was correcting or leading me in a certain direction, but purely reminding me of something I once desired….which makes me wonder what God has in mind, you know?

Years ago, when Niger was experiencing a severe famine, my heart was so there - - I wanted to be there. I know right now, I live on easy street in Africa…we don’t have violent crime like South Africa….rebels like Sudan…food or petrol shortages like Zimbabwe…but a part of me wants to be in the midst of those situations. Light shines the brightest in the darkest places – right?

So, with all that the DRC is going through (and if you don’t know what is going on – go educate yourself. We need to stop burying our heads in the sand and understand the same thing that happened in Rwanda is about to happen again and that’s not ok. We need to do something about it...but back to the point of the blog…), every time I hear something about the DRC, it just piques my interest. Maybe I just want to be some sort of humanitarian adrenaline junky or maybe I have seen Hotel Rwanda, The Last King of Scotland, and Blood Diamond too many times…but I don’t know…maybe I’ll end up in a place like that eventually.

But on the flip side, DC sounds equally appealing. Honestly, there aren’t many places in the US that are attractive to me. Right now, the consumerism, constant stress and pressure in the states is proving to be a powerful repellent…but in DC, there is such an opportunity to change – to create and lead. Idyllic, I know. But I have to believe that things don’t have to stay this way…things can change, can improve – can thrive. I guess that’s why DC is so fascinating to me right now.

Dichotomy of the situation is amusing, I am sure…but for now, it’s Swaziland…and for the remainder of my life, time will tell.
I recently read something that spoke of the continued growth in organizations and they said organizations cease to progress when their leaders meet their fear threshold. If I never live in the DRC or DC, that’s fine..., I just don’t want fear to be the thing that holds me back. Go big, or go home, right?

Transitions

The only steady thing about life here in Swaziland seems to be transitions…

Transitioning into a new country, culture, church, job, house, relationships…

But now I feel like that was just the beginning…Natalie has gone back to the states….This weekend Karl will leave for Zimbabwe for a couple of months…and Jordan is going back to the states to fundraise….early December, Zinty will be headed to Zim for Christmas break…as Ps. Mike will be moving to Zim…Christy will be moving back to the states on the 20th of December…when Jessie also travels back to the states for Christmas…all about a week before my best friends get married back in the states…

Then, after Christmas, we’ll have some new staff, an intern, and I will be a few weeks out from an entirely new job description.

Some days it is easier than others…I love my life here, so I guess it is that whole feeling of don’t mess with a good thing….but good is the enemy of great, right? So, you learn to be flexible…to have vision without expectation of how you expect God to move…while having faith that He knows EXACTLY what the big picture looks like and is completely capable of seeing it through.

But for now, it is so sweet to just rest in Him, for He is a steady rock, my firm foundation…

What I'm Listening To...

Haven’t done this one in a while, but, for what it’s worth, here is what I have been listening to:

• Graham Cooke (smokin’ British preacher that Natalie got me hooked on)
• Louie Giglio (seriously, guys…could there be a better communicator – LOVE him!)
• Deluge…the youth band out of Bethany World Prayer Center…awesome live worship
• World Mandate 2003 out of Antioch Community Church – sweet missions flow
• Misty Edwards – you have no idea what you are missing! His love makes it worth it!!!!
• This is Our God by Hillsong (Love ‘The Same Power’…the some power that conquered the grave lives in me, Lives in me…Love that! Need to remember that!!!)
• Saviour King…In Your Freedom. I know I blogged about this one before – but it still speaks so much to me…I have nothing more, than all You offer me, There is nothing less, that’s of worth to me…I love You, Lord, You rescued me, You are all that want, Your all need…In Your freedom, I will live, I offer devotion, I offer devotion.
• And, I’ll admit…a little Christmas music…don’t hate…Swaziland isn’t in fall and doesn’t celebrate Thanksgiving…so we get started on Christmas a little earlier than in the states

Dreams in my heart…

Last week at church, Ps. Ben spoke on where are headed and being intentional about leading the life we are called to, which got me thinking. I am sure a lot of you can relate to that prayer, “God, what am I here for? What is my calling? How do I use these passions You have placed in my heart to honor You?” God basically smoked me with two things, don’t live on yesterday’s revelations & know Him.
A few years ago, Ps. Randy gave me the incredible opportunity to attend the Drive 2006 conference at North Point Community Church. It was a huge life-defining time in my life, trying to figure out what I wanted to go to school for...what I wanted from a job…ministry – life, basically. And I remember the second session in the pre-conference, I attended the Missions breakout. What I heard was pretty life changing. Before then, I knew I was called to missions, but had a heart for service production and really wasn’t sure how I could serve God with both of those and wondering why God would have me be passionate in two seemingly opposite areas- I just didn’t see how the nations and a detailed-oriented job in service production related. The missions pastor was sharing his role within NPCC – essentially, he worked with local churches in various nations North Point worked with, creating irresistible environments in a culturally relevant way. Total light bulb moment for me – God just showed me how those two passions in my life would one day merge.

Now, on the day before my 22nd birthday, it will be my first Sunday to work in service production at Healing Place Church Swaziland. I never thought it would be that soon, but God smoked me in this. I guess I just thought it would be many more years…decades, maybe, before I would be doing something like this.

Mainly, I was just scared for what I would miss if I am not in constant communion with Christ. I was going on thinking that this calling would hold me over for years and years, but it wasn’t meant to be that way! So what about all these other things God has put in my heart? What if they come about in a few years? Then what?

I guess it goes back to knowing Him…when you are truly seeking His heart, you aren’t going to miss what He has for you, but it made me realize I can’t rely on last years, last months, last weeks revelation from God…what is He saying to you today?
Thank you for your support! It is such an extraordinary thing to watch dreams of your heart come alive.

What to pray for this week

I am SO EXCITED about the BAYSIDE TEAM!!! You have NO IDEA what it means to me to have this team come and serve in Swaziland. But I did want to remind you to pray for them while they are here October 20th – 28th. You can lift up the team – for unity, flexibility, and servant’s hearts; for energy and good health; for the amazing time of ministry at Ngwane Park; and that we would always be seek His heart and be open to how God wants work through them and in them in HUGE ways. Please also lift us up as we host the team…as trilled as I am to have them here, our day to day ministry and duties don’t stop when a team comes in, so pray for grace, energy, and wisdom as we balance our normal lives with the time with the team.

Thank you for your prayers and everyone who not only supports me, but this team – allowing all of us to be Christ’s hands and feet in SD!

And for anyone who would ever want to come out to Swaziland who couldn’t make this team, let me know! We could certainly work something out; we would love to have you!

Giving: Intermediate Version

A couple posts back, I was sharing how I was a bit slow to get this whole giving process. Thankfully, God trusted me enough to give me another chance to work on this.

Friday night I was praying and I was getting so, so frustrated...just feeling like - God, what do you want from me – but He has been rather quiet….the very frustrating part. I picked up My Utmost for His Highest and for that day it read:

All God’s revelations are sealed until they are opened to us by obedience. You will never get them open by philosophy or thinking…Obey the thing He shows you, and instantly the next thing is opened up…God will never reveal more truth about Himself until you have obeyed what you know already…

I knew God wanted me to abide in Him, to rest in that, to wait….BUT, since I had such a desire to go and do, He said I could practice that whole giving deal again…He said He wanted me to give my hat to Shelly for her birthday. Not just any hat, but the only one I love – the suede one I got at Macy’s in Boston on vacation with a million and one special memories tied to it…

I don’t know which thought actually came first…the ‘Oh No, that’s my favorite, it means so much to me!’ or ‘Yes, Lord’…I just knew that I didn’t want new revelations to be hindered by my lack of obedience. I wish I could say that I enjoyed giving the hat to her, but I really didn’t – maybe that is lesson 3 in giving…but I knew if it depended on keeping a hat or God revealing more truth, I figured I was better off with the latter...

Silence

I know this is long, but bear with me…this is basically part 2 of my Friday night, after the lesson on giving. It is really amazing how God can be so silent, but even still, He meets you there. Honestly, sometimes I wish God didn’t trust me with silence. I know He knows my heart desires to be completely faithful, to follow where ever He leads, but I know He sees that very human side that cries, Lord, would You just speak to me…I don’t care if it’s not the answer I want, I just want to hear You say something.

I went to read Ps. 25:1-3 (UNTO YOU, O Lord, do I bring my life. O my God, I trust, lean on, rely on, and am confident in You. Let me not be put to shame or [my hope in You] be disappointed; let not my enemies triumph over me. Yes, let none who trust and wait hopefully and look for You be put to shame or be disappointed; let them be ashamed who forsake the right or deal treacherously without cause.), but stopped at Ps. 22, 25 and then onto 27. I don’t think God’s Word had ever been more real to me as it was right then. I was so tired, I wanted to be faithful, I had been seeking God more than ever – craving His presence and all I got was silence, silence, silence…then I read:

…MY GOD, my God, why have You forsaken me? Why are You so far from helping me, and from the words of my groaning? O my God, I cry in the daytime, but You answer not; and by night I am not silent or find no rest.
...I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint. My heart is like wax; it is softened [with anguish] and melted down within me. My strength is dried up like a fragment of clay pottery; [with thirst] my tongue cleaves to my jaws; and You have brought me into the dust of death….

…For He has not despised or abhorred the affliction of the afflicted; neither has He hidden His face from him, but when he cried to Him, He heard. My praise shall be of You in the great congregation. I will pay to Him my vows [made in the time of trouble] before them who fear (revere and worship) Him. The poor and afflicted shall eat and be satisfied; they shall praise the Lord--they who [diligently] seek for, inquire of and for Him, and require Him [as their greatest need]. May your hearts be quickened now and forever!

…UNTO YOU, O Lord, do I bring my life. O my God, I trust, lean on, rely on, and am confident in You. Let me not be put to shame or [my hope in You] be disappointed; let not my enemies triumph over me. Yes, let none who trust and wait hopefully and look for You be put to shame or be disappointed; let them be ashamed who forsake the right or deal treacherously without cause. Show me Your ways, O Lord; teach me Your paths. Guide me in Your truth and faithfulness and teach me, for You are the God of my salvation; for You [You only and altogether] do I wait [expectantly] all the day long. Remember, O Lord, Your tender mercy and loving-kindness; for they have been ever from of old. Remember not the sins (the lapses and frailties) of my youth or my transgressions; according to Your mercy and steadfast love remember me, for Your goodness' sake, O Lord. Good and upright is the Lord; therefore will He instruct sinners in [His] way. He leads the humble in what is right, and the humble He teaches His way. All the paths of the Lord are mercy and steadfast love, even truth and faithfulness are they for those who keep His covenant and His testimonies. For Your name's sake, O Lord, pardon my iniquity and my guilt, for [they are] great. Who is the man who reverently fears and worships the Lord? Him shall He teach in the way that he should choose. He himself shall dwell at ease, and his offspring shall inherit the land. The secret [of the sweet, satisfying companionship] of the Lord have they who fear (revere and worship) Him, and He will show them His covenant and reveal to them its [deep, inner] meaning. My eyes are ever toward the Lord, for He will pluck my feet out of the net. [Lord] turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. The troubles of my heart are multiplied; bring me out of my distresses. Behold my affliction and my pain and forgive all my sins [of thinking and doing]. Consider my enemies, for they abound; they hate me with cruel hatred. O keep me, Lord, and deliver me; let me not be ashamed or disappointed, for my trust and my refuge are in You. Let integrity and uprightness preserve me, for I wait for and expect You. Redeem Israel, O God, out of all their troubles.

…Hear, O Lord, when I cry aloud; have mercy and be gracious to me and answer me! You have said, Seek My face [inquire for and require My presence as your vital need]. My heart says to You, Your face (Your presence), Lord, will I seek, inquire for, and require [of necessity and on the authority of Your Word]. Hide not Your face from me; turn not Your servant away in anger, You Who have been my help! Cast me not off, neither forsake me, O God of my salvation!

…Wait and hope for and expect the Lord; be brave and of good courage and let your heart be stout and enduring. Yes, wait for and hope for and expect the Lord.

I knew God heard my heart; His Spirit met me there. God was (and still is) incredibly quiet…He had nothing more to add then what I had just read. For now, He has me depending His history of faithfulness.

The next day in My Utmost for His Highest read:

AFTER GOD'S SILENCE - WHAT?

"When He had heard therefore that he was sick, He abode two days in the same place where he was." John 11:6

Has God trusted you with a silence - a silence that is big with meaning? God's silences are His answers. Think of those days of absolute silence in the home at Bethany! Is there anything analogous to those days in your life? Can God trust you like that, or are you still asking for a visible answer? God will give you the blessings you ask if you will not go any further without them; but His silence is the sign that He is bringing you into a marvellous understanding of Himself. Are you mourning before God because you have not had an audible response? You will find that God has trusted you in the most intimate way possible, with an absolute silence, not of despair, but of pleasure, because He saw that you could stand a bigger revelation. If God has given you a silence, praise Him, He is bringing you into the great run of His purposes. The manifestation of the answer in time is a matter of God's sovereignty. Time is nothing to God. For a while you said - "I asked God to give me bread, and He gave me a stone." He did not, and to-day you find He gave you the bread of life.

A wonderful thing about God's silence is that the contagion of His stillness gets into you and you become perfectly confident - "I know God has heard me." His silence is the proof that He has. As long as you have the idea that God will bless you in answer to prayer, He will do it, but He will never give you the grace of silence. If Jesus Christ is bringing you into the understanding that prayer is for the glorifying of His Father, He will give you the first sign of His intimacy - silence.

Meet One of the King’s Daughters…

This is Sindi, one of the King’s precious baby girls. Both her earthly parents have passed and she lives with her 6 year old brother, 9 year old sister, and teenage brother.

Just over a week ago, Sindi was sleeping next to the fire when her jacket caught fire. Not only did she receive 2nd and 3rd degree burns on her shoulder and right arm, her leg was also badly burned when pieces of her jacket melted and dropped onto her leg. Her siblings were able to get her to RFM (a hospital – with a definite 3rd world feel) where they were able to clean her wound. What breaks my heart is that she was sent home with an injury that would grant you a certain hospital admission in a 1st world nation. It was that next Monday that we received a call from her CarePoint teachers that she needed care.

It was such a blessing to have the River Valley Church team to love on her and sit with her until we got there. One of the girls from RVC held her the whole trip to the clinic and while she was waiting for Jessie to see her. Precious Sindi had wet herself in the meantime, so we were able to bathe her – you all, God is so faithful. After I had finished, I realized I had nothing to put her in…and started praying that God would provide something for Sindi. I found a shirt in one of our closets that I was able to cut an arm hole in to avoid it from sticking and even a fleece vest – an incredible blessing to help her regulate her body temp, which would be very difficult with her injury.

We had her drinking lots of water and eating lots of protein. Then….I just held her as she cried in my chest as Jessie dressed her wounds (for those that care: we used B.A.P., which is an antiseptic cream– wrapped in cling wrap, Ace bandages, and some tape to secure the bandages). After finishing, I totally pulled a Brittney Spears and had her sit on my lap while I drove her back to her CarePoint, then had to drop her off with her siblings and gave them instructions for her care.

I went to go check on her the next day and bring her some new clothes, thankfully, the bandages on her arm looked great and I only had to fix the one on her leg. She cried when we came close, so I was DREADING having to come in two more days to change the dressings on her arm….but – this little girl has a lot of people praying for her, and God totally showed up!

That day, I had little Sindi sit in my car when I was taking off her bandages…it was an incredibly tedious process, taking over an hour to remove the bandages – at times, cutting them thread by thread. I had prayed so hard that we wouldn’t hurt her, that she wouldn’t feel the pain, and about half way through, Jacci had to hold her head up because she was FALLING ASLEEP! Yes!!! Holy Ghost anesthesia!! An hour and a half later…she had new bandages, new clothes, lots of water and protein, and rubber glove balloons for the whole family.

I have been able to see her again since then, and she is doing wonderfully. She is more active and is finally smiling again. Pray for her, she still has a lot of healing to do. Pray for her brothers and sister, for their protection; pray for her CarePoint teachers, Treasure and Make Peggy.

Thank you for your prayers and thank you for your support that makes it possible to serve here. God is so good.

Loving This!!

If everything is lost, thanks be to God

If I must see it go, watch it go,

Watch it fade away and die

Thanks be to God that He is all I have

And if I have Him not I have nothing at all

Nothing at all, only a farewell to the wind

Farewell to the grey sky

Goodbye, God be with you evening October sky.

If all is lost, thanks be to God,

For He is He, and I, I am only I!


...from the lovely Natalie Spera's blog...check it out here.

Two Months….

I can scarcely believe that I have been living in Swaziland for two months today…I know I haven’t been the best at providing updates or blogging. There is so much to say, but I fail to reconcile it all in my own mind, much less being able to convey what I really feel…

It is too much to keep thinking on; pondering…so here is my feeble attempt to clue you in to my life, my heart:

“Yes, Lord, walking in the way of your judgments, we wait for you; for your name and renown are the desire of our hearts.” Is 26:8

That’s it. Yes, Lord. That is all I really want. In the end, I just want to be found faithful in one thing…that my answer is always, “Yes, Lord”. Not spoken with resistance, hesitance, sorrow, anger, disappointment….just surrender.

From my time here, I have discovered so much of me was intertwined in serving God. I had an exceptional plan…I would get my MPH and serve in local church, graduate, work in international missions and global development. I thought it was a good plan, but it was mine. It was not God’s.

I remember last semester, I had written a lit review on research articles concerning Swaziland for one of my public health classes. True to the school nerd in me, I took much pleasure in researching and preparing my paper. But here is the ridiculous part of the story, I remember getting my paper back and my professor had commented that it was an excellent paper, written with passion and as I left class and walked to my car, I just started to cry. I was so sad to be giving up school. I knew I was doing the right thing, but I was well aware that I was walking from something I had found success and gratification in and was now headed toward something very, very….unknown. The last day I was on campus, I went to sell my textbooks back at the USF Health bookstore and I remember I was walking through the hall, fighting back tears, wondering if I would ever be back in school.

The next few months were quite hectic as I prepared to move, but days into getting here, the decision to leave school to move here hit me square in the face. First, I had no idea how much of my self worth was tied to my academic life…which, honestly, I still struggle with. A few weeks later, I just became mad at God. Didn’t He know I would be of so much more benefit if He just let me finish my degree? Did He not realize my potential? Had He forgotten that I was going to use it to serve Him?

I am in a Bible class here and in one session, Pastor Ron said that when refining gold, the last thing to go was silver. Silver is valued, but it is not the best – you have to stay in the refiners fire to achieve that level purity. With that said, school – in that season of my life – was silver, and in answering “Yes, Lord” I had to lay it at the alter; I had to go back into the refiner’s fire. So, as to whether I will ever return to school, I do not know.
There is truly no place, no university, no church, than I would rather be than right here, because I am completely confident that He has called me here, now. God is so faithful, I know He is. I pray that my “Yes, Lord” would never be dependent on the question…

I love the quote that says, “When the will of God collides with the will of man, someone must die”. God, let that be me…God, I always want to be the one offering my will…God, I want to be found faithful….Take me deeper still, Lord…‘for your name and renown are the desire of our hearts.’

What I am thankful for…

I have the most incredible opportunity of living in Swaziland, ministering here, I truly LOVE it. It is the most amazing blessing to wake up and think, “This is it; there is no other place I would rather be!” I know you are where God called you to be is a remarkable blessing – the joy you have in that is incredible. So, here are a couple of things that remind me of that throughout the day:

…Natalie!!! If you know her, you totally understand this one!!!! She represents Jesus better than anyone I know! She is full of JOY, is so real and honest! I love that she is part of my life now!

…Zinty!!! Everyone needs a Zinty in their life! She is an amazing encourager and listener. She is hysterical and I love doing life with her, but even more important, she is so surrendered to God. She only wants Him, His best. She understands crucifying self and following Him….and that it is all worth it.

…The CarePoint kids. They have this remarkable talent of causing everything else in the world fade away…for your heart to become still…and just rest in the fact that there is an precious child sitting in your lap and you have the opportunity to be Jesus to them.

…The Aid Agencies in SD. I still get excited when I see WFP, UNICEF, UN, NERCHA, and World Vision drive by. Each one of those decals on their cars reminds me that I am serving in a developing nation. God is so cool!

…The natural beauty of Swaziland. The brilliant stars, the red earth, the mountains – I love it! The rain is beginning to come and the country is once again becoming green – the Jacaranda trees are full of their purple flowers. Even on those days where the fog never burns off and the mist settles in the mountains…God is so amazing.

…Wednesday Ladies Bible Study. Thank you Jesus for these women! They are awesome, they love God, and they deeply care about each other….and they can jump your car for you if need be (see post below).

…My roommates: Sandra, Nat, and Jessie. Having always lived with the ‘rents, I wasn’t too sure how I would be flowin with four females in the same house…and sharing a room with one of them, but…I love it! It really is such a cool experience – I have learned so much about myself and how I relate and interact with people. They are a great support system and lots of fun!

…Our house! As I write this, I am sitting in a chair next to all the windows looking out on the mountains, not bad, huh? It really is a blessing to share a house that is affordable, safe, and that has a lovely patio with extraordinary views!

…Staff meetings every Tuesday morning. Incredible. Needed. Refreshing. Convicting. Challenging. Encouraging! A definite blessing!

…‘Cup office staff. Anyone who sings to you when you wear a skirt to the office, has to bring a smile to your face, right? Love Queenth and Gugu! And Nathie, KB, Nomty….they just bring JOY to my life!

…Karl Marx. Karl – a Zimbabwean - is one of the ‘Cup interns who live next door with the guys, but (thank you Lord for this blessing!) Karl will be staying in Swaziland after the internship finishes, coming on HPC staff as our Children’s Pastor. Karl does a fantastic job with the kids – they are so excited about God and worship and serving! And besides that…it is so fascinating to talk to him about cultural differences between Americans and Africans; very cool to get his perspective.

…Pick-n-Pay…seriously! If you know me, you know I love to go grocery shopping and Pick-n-Pay is pretty wonderful in terms of grocery stores in Swaziland. Y’all need to get more excited about this one!

…Saturday. Forgot how FUN Saturdays are! After Saturday services started Easter 2006 at Bayside, my Saturday chill time was a bit….absent. As much as I loved being involved in the weekend experience at Bayside, I have to say, having a real day off, with no classes, no homework, no office hours, no meetings, and no service is…nice! I love hanging out with my roommates, reading, chilling with friends, cooking dinner…just a day to slow down and enjoy the life God has called me to.

…Mornings. My, how things have changed, seeing how my typical bedtime in the states was only 2-3 hours earlier that I get up now. I cherish the time, the quiet…the stillness….the peace. And the knowledge that we serve a big God….after all, waking up naturally at 5:30am would take nothing less…

…Ben and Susan Rodgers. I am so thankful to be serving under Ben’s leadership in both Children’s Cup and Healing Place Church. He is incredibly accessible, driven, and he cares more about my relationship with God than anything I could do for him, the church, or ‘Cup. My heart is just blessed when he asks, “How are you doing?” Because I know he is actually expecting an honest answer. Same with Susan! It brings such peace to know that someone cares so deeply about your experience on the field and that she is here for me – and she really means that. And this woman totally has the gift of hospitality and such a giving spirit! Such an example to learn from!

…Worship at Healing Place Church Swaziland. I love worship at Bayside, love Jordan, love the band – it was such an honor working with them for the years that I did. Maybe that is why this one is so precious to me…I love the worship team here
– their hearts. I love the passion, the expression, the different languages. Awesome.

…New Missionaries. The two months I have been here, God has brought FOUR new missionaries. Thank you, Lord! Jessie to medically care for all the 4,700+ children we care for in SD….Greg and Kristin Evan – wow, HUGE blessing to HPC! Greg is amazing with creating and raising up teams and Kristin is an incredible asset with all her experience as a Children’s Pastor. And, the brilliant Mike Pier! Pastor Mike will be leaving Swaziland soon to head out and work with Pastor Dixon in Zim. Sad about that, but Zimbabwe has got a huge blessing headed their way.

…God. He loves us, He loves us, He LOVES US!!!! He reigns with LOVE, and MERCY, and GRACE, and JUSTICE. He doesn’t relent until He has our ALL. He PERSUES US. Isn’t love so amazing? It gives, it sacrifices, it forgives, it serves, it pours out, it seeks out, it is steadfast. And we serve a GOD of LOVE!

I realize some were much more serious than others, but they all have brought a smile to my face at some point. Something else God has shown me…He cares so deeply, knows us so intimately. From bringing me Make Sarah at Spar or the girl at Edgars to ask me which purse is cuter when that cultural shock factor was creeping up, just to remind me that women are women whether in the US or SD…and we still need each others help on deciding which purse looks best. If God is in the purse department, He certainly has the rest of the world under control!

Remedial Version

Missionaries are the most giving people I have ever met. I suppose it could be the knowledge that we could not be serving here without other’s faithful and sacrificial giving…or maybe because in coming out here you leave a lot of belongings behind – and you begin to understand that it was all just “stuff” anyway. From the bedspread that Susan gave me or the tea from Natalie (you know she had to hear from God to bless me with that one!) God has just used the people here to bring special blessings in my life.

Me on the other hand…I think I enrolled in the slow to understand version of the lesson on giving. And here is why….

I flew into Africa about a week before Jessie, my roommate. Because I got here first, I got the only gate clicker left. Up until now, that hasn’t been such an issue - neither one of us had cars, so we always had to ride home with someone who did. After getting our cars last week, Jessie really needed to get a clicker – to which God told me, “How about you give her yours”. Umm, how about no. I was here first, I was given the clicker, it was mine, she can just get her own. God asked, “You sure about that one”. Yes, God…it isn’t that hard for her to go get one herself, I don’t need to give her mine.

Next day, I was leaving the house and pulled up to the gate, pressed my clicker to open it…nothing. So, drive back to the house – I am sure it is the battery, it was struggling before. Put a new battery in, hop back in the car, drive to the gate, click…nothing. Click…......Click……Click….Click, Click, Click. Yeah, still nothing. At this point, I am actually laughing, guess it is what I get for being so adamant on keeping my clicker, huh? As Natalie put it, “Guess someone was holding on a little too tightly to something.” So now Jessie has the brand new clicker and the clicker I wanted to badly still doesn’t work.

“[Remember] this: he who sows sparingly and grudgingly will also reap sparingly and grudgingly, and he who sows generously [that blessings may come to someone] will also reap generously and with blessing.” 2 Cor. 9:6

Pray that I am still in order to hear and quick to obey.

1 Peter 5:10

“And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace [Who imparts all blessing and favor], Who has called you to His [own] eternal glory in Christ Jesus, will Himself complete and make you what you ought to be, establish and ground you securely, and strengthen, and settle you.” 1Peter 5:10

I love the sense of expectation this verse creates. There will be suffering, molding, refining, but there is the promise that God will make Himself complete and make us what we ought to be!! Isn’t that amazing?

The past couple of weeks have incredible, in that I have felt securely ground, strengthened, and settled – truly by God’s precious grace and work in my life. And as I look forward to the rumored 3-month anniversary missionary funk, exhausting team season, the departure of the lovely Natalie Spera, and my first Thanksgiving/Christmas without the family, then a change in ministry areas/job descriptions…. it can still seem quite disconcerting.

I was looking up the word “suffer”…and the dictionary said it was to “feel pain, undergo something unpleasant, or to endure something”. I love that! We have a God that says that we are going to feel pain…we are going to have to endure, but that we can stand firm on the fact that in that, He will make us what we ought to be!! HE WILL ESTABLISH US! GROUND US SECURELY and STRENGTHEN and SETTLE US!!!

God will show Himself faithful, I just need to allow Him the opportunity to do so…

“I wait for the Lord, I expectantly wait, and in His word I do hope. I am looking and waiting for the Lord more than watchmen for the morning, I say, more than the watchmen for the morning.” Ps. 130:5,6

“God is in the midst of her, she shall not be moved; God will help her right early [at the dawn of the morning]. Ps. 46:5

The Right Outlook

“Now therefore, I pray You, if I have found favor in Your sight, show me now Your way, that I may know You [progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with You, perceiving and recognizing and understanding more strongly and clearly] and that I may find favor in Your sight. And [Lord, do] consider that this nation is Your people…..And Moses said to the Lord, If Your Presence does not go with me, do not carry us up from here!” Ex. 33:13,15

Love this! If God’s presence wasn’t going to be there, Moses didn’t want anything to do with it. He wanted the Lord’s presence more than a place, a situation, a specific outcome.

And the Lord said to Moses, I will do this thing also that you have asked, for you have found favor, loving-kindness, and mercy in My sight and I know you personally and by name. And Moses said, I beseech You, show me Your glory. And God said, I will make all my goodness pass before you, and I will proclaim my name, THE LORD, before you; for I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show mercy and loving-kindness on whom I will show mercy and loving-kindness. Ex 33:17-19

Missions Team from Bayside…

Can’t wait to give you all a glimpse into my life here – I didn’t know that would mean so much to me!

It’s hard to believe you all will be on your way in less than TWO WEEKS! I am so excited for you! Obviously, my first trip to Africa was rather life changing, and I know God wants to do the same in your lives. I am praying for each one of you; I am eagerly waiting to see how God revels Himself to you!

See you on the 20th!

The Throne of my Heart

The throne of my heart has an incompetent ruler without You,
I look to You for, the love of You, the peace from You to silence all the noise with You,
To bring tranquility to all the scattered thoughts with You.
I learn to think of You and not of me,
To go deep in You, until I lose who I used to be,
With You I can be everything You intended me to be.

And it’s in this sacred space where I lay my ability to be anything without You,
Were I lay my preconceived notions about You,
Where I forget about me to remember life is about You.
To remember I live for Your smile.
To remember I live for Your smile more than I live to please the crowd.

Make me like water, see through me, see You through me.
Nothing left of me to see. Cleanse me, immerse me in purity, wash me of iniquity.
Help me to choose You, to lavish You a lifestyle worthy of You,
To lavish You with more than words, to lavish You with all that You deserve.

…From Steve Fee’s song “Sacred Space”…If you listen to the song, I promise you’ll think the song is so much cooler.

My Little Rav...

So....Praise Jesus!!! I got my car, a little black RAV, on Saturday. Such a blessing! And it has already increased my ministry opportunities in big ways! But that also makes for a crazy week! So, when I was leaving Bible Study this morning, I hoped in my car and turn the key...click, click, click...hmmmm, thats not what I was planning on hearing.

Keep in mind that car issues are totally normal here in Africa - much more common and to be expected.

I walked back inside and get Sandra to come jump me - so far, so good. We decided I would drive into town and have the guys at the office look at it. After an additional mid-town jump, I made it to the office where we decided I should take it to James - the mechanic - to look at it.

I had already heard great things about James - he is from Moz., hard worker, loves Jesus, won't do work you don't need, honest price, etc...Jessie jumped me again and Nat was going to follow me to James'. Great plan until my car died halfway there.....yeah.....

So, Nat and I decided we would try to jump my car there in the turn lane (...what else were we going to do, right?). Then these guys yell, "Just push it, push it out of the way". Which made me think...umm, yeah, great idea, but it is kinda hard to steer and push your vehicle at the same time, you know...??? Then they say, get in...close your bonnet...we will push. Sure enough, these two Swazis get behind my Rav and start pushing, telling me which way to turn. They get going and before I know it, I have a group of guys pushing me across the busy intersection to the Shell station. Nat thought it was great...it was rather funny, and such a great blessing. They helped us jump the car and we safely made it to James.

After about an hour, he called and said I could pick up my Rav. Does any car in the states get fixed that quick? He just tightened the clamps on the battery and put one of those straps over it (the ones that keep it from bouncing around...).

Grand total: $100. $100 Rand that it....YEBO, just $12.50 USD. Praise God for providing a car...for friends to jump it!...for those guys to help push it!...and for James! God is so good!

This Week....

This week was just crazy!! Lots of moments to just stop, breathe deep, relax, and know that God is so sovereign, so amazing, so worthy! At the end of the week, I have grown so much spiritually...I am amazed at the friends God has blessed me with...and gotten a lot accomplished at work - it is all coming together! Even better, I get to minister to incredible children and youth in Swaziland!!

I have to run...time for 412 (HPC Youth), but I just wanted to encourage you all to REST IN HIM! It is the best place to be!!!

Flat Warts, 85% & LOVE

After Teachers Meeting last week, Christy (our Education Coordinator) took us by her CarePoint, Moneni. And this boy TOTALLY STOLE MY HEART!Isn't he wonderful?



I went down to go sit with the children and of course, you get surrounded by adorable kids...but then I look down and see HIM! It really wasn't love at first sight...my thought process was more like...That looks like Flat Warts...That is Flat Wart....And they are all over him...That kid is HIV+....He is older...85% of HIV+ children who are not on ARVs will die before the age of 10...This little boy might just have two years left if he is lucky....and THAT is when I fell in love with this boy! He was my best friend for the rest of the day! I just wanted to show this precious boy some LOVE!

But there is an AMAZING ending to this story!!! I was trying to get a little background info to see if he had been tested yet, etc. So I started to ask how many children live at home (there was a total of 22 people living with the family)...did he live with his parents (his dad died, but he lives with his mom and Gogo)...Then I asked his teacher if he had been to our clinic yet...she said that he had, but he has his own doctor. Praise Jesus!!! It turns out that he had been tested, and although he is positive, he is on ARVs and sees a doc at the Baylor Clinic, and this little nine year old boy has a much longer future to look forward to. A future still to be written, one that can evoke change in his generation, one that can be spent passionately seeking His Redeemer, His Healer.

Such an incredible day; a huge win for us in Swaziland!

Make Sure to Check Out....

I love Christy's cense of humor and persepctive. Check her blog out at http://deepthoughtsandrandomramblings.blogspot.com/

...yes, I hate Shoprite, but I am sad it burned because the grocery is constantly INSANE now!

...Love, Love, Love! I am so excited to be serving at a church that people will attend just because of the LOVE they feel when they are here - even if they don't understand anything that is said!

...and in defense about the size of the cake slices...Ben said to give them BIG slices so they would go home with full stomachs. I am just glad I am not the mother of any of those kids - talk about a sugar high! Eish!

HPC this Sunday

Can I say how AWESOME service was yesterday!?!

It was incredible! We had our first baptism service, it was so cool! HPC is growing, we had 140 people in service yesterday. Thank you, Jesus! We started we praise and worship...where Zinty does such an amazing job, so Spirit led. Then the dunking began!

We had 33 children and adults! And they were so passionately about living a life for our Savior...standing up in this dark place! It was such a celebration, with songs and chanting and cheering after each person. It was great to just praise HIM and what HE has done in these lives of Benson, Zarl, Zama, Ruth, Ms. Joyce, and the rest of our church family. Praise Him!

I guess they were right....

So many people told me this first year on the field is much more about me and God working in me than about what He will accomplish through me. Sure, there will be lots of incredible ministry and God will work through me here, but it is really more about God molding me...and the past few days, that has made more and more sense to me.

The other night, I was reading Passion & Purity again...such an incredible book about surrender...but when I read this, I stopped:

"If my life is broken when given to Jesus, it is because pieces will feed a multitude, while a loaf will safisfy only a little lad...."

My immediate reaction while reading that proved to me that what these other pastors and missionaries said was true...Sometimes I don't care about feeding the multitude. I would rather the whole loaf, as long as I can be satisfied. I didn't really feel like a life of brokeness.

My prayer last week...my heart was that I want to be found faithful...God has taken me up on that prayer, for now I have the opportunity to walk out my allegience.

"...When the will of God crosses the will of man, somebody has to die..."

"...I will not offer the Lord my God whole-offerings that have cost me nothing..."

Hello!

Good Morning!

Life here has been awesome, lots going on! The days here are getting more and more interesting...I will be posting more details throughout the week.

40/40 (for the King's 40th birthday and a celebration of the 40th anniversary of the Kingdom) but it caused some pretty crazy things...

We have normal clinics today and Thursday, but we also have medical trainig for about 20 new teachers on Wednesday and Thursday morning.

This past weekend we held a Youth Lock-in with a partner church north of us and the HPC youth leaders - there was about 50 of us. It started out with normal Friday night youth, but it was AWESOME. We were in the middle of worship when the power cut off. The youth didn't miss a beat, they just pressed in and worshipping with all they had. Jordan spoke about Jeremiah and how he had a fire in his bones for the word God gave him. We finished out youth praying over the students who committed to seeking God, living like Jeremiah, with a fire in our bones, passionately sharing the word God has given us.

The lock in was great...dodge ball, chair ball, relays, drinking really nasty concoctions from the blender....all those youth games...lots of junk food, 10 hours of house music, dancing, and skits. It was great to see our leaders having such an awesome time in church, building relationships with other youth passionate about Christ!

Greg and Kristen Evan were delayed a bit, but will be arriving today! And Pastor Mike Pier arrived late last week...(he will be staying in Swaziland until he receives his visa for Zim). But we are so excited to have them all here with us...pray as they get settled in and adjust to life here.

Also, thank you for joining us in the 40 Days of Prayer, which ends today! We are blessed by your prayers and ask that you would continue to pray for us, espcially as the team here begins to stategically plan and pray over 2009.

Love you all!

Tuesday....

I love Tuesdays! We start off with staff meetings, which is a great time to just touch base with everyone and their respective areas of 'Cup. We are all so excited about the new staff coming out this week, with Kristen and Greg coming on Thursday and Mike Pier coming out Friday.

Usually I attend Pastor Ron's class with other missionaries, which is awesome! Currently, we are studying the Journey of Israel. It is pretty hard core, with memory verses, TONS of reading, papers, and tests; but I am learning a lot and really enjoy it!

But yesterday Jessie and I had to leave early to pack up supplies for mobile clinic. I was also able to start going through some of our meds, organizing it all and getting ready for inventory.

We were able to check on one of our patients, who was able to get a hard cast for her arm, Praise God! Picked up some kids from RFM - the Nazarene Hospital, who were there for their ARVs. After dropping them off at their homestead, we went to Fonteyn CarePoint, right near our house. After clinic, we were able to play with the kids some, which is always great!

We played in their fort, danced, and they played with my hair...which they kept saying is "smooth like margarine".

After coming back to the office for a bit, I went home...cooked stuffed bell peppers for our house, did laundry, talked to some of the Bayside staff on the phone (LOVE YOU ALL, so great to talk with you!), and hung out with Natalie....

And some pics to go with it...



Sorry, Blogger decided it no longer wanted to upload my pictures, so that is all for now.

Love hearing from you all!

My Sunday afternoon...

So in the states...Sunday afternoons usually brings family lunches, lazy afternoons, and naps....

In Swaziland, we ended up at Victoria's funeral...that's right, our pet chicken is no longer with us....

Here is what Sandra had to say about it:

On Sunday the 31st of August, I am sorry to inform all my readers that Victoria was found deceased.

I was out of the country and am relaying the message second hand.
Sunday I was told there were very high winds in Mbabane.
One theory is that high winds caught her and slammed her into a concrete wall to which she had internal injury.
Another theory is that she had a bowel impaction that ruptured her colon.
I was informed that they had a simple service for her and buried her in the garden.
Victoria is survived by the members of the two households:
Sandra, Natalie, Sarah and Jessie
Patrick, Jordon, Karl and Daniel (and Rick in the states who bought her with Patrick)

The boys have pictures to prove the second theory...but I don't think I'll post those....

More Pictures

The pharmacy at the clinic...




Aren't these boys ADORABLE?! I LOVE the rain boots!

Pics

Boys from the CarePoint that we hold the clinics at...



Jessie and I our first day of clinic...

Clinics!!

Jessie and I doing clinics by ourselves for the first time!!! It was pretty intense for the both of us....a couple of kids with TB, one HIV+ girl that will hopefully be getting to start ARVs soon, scabies, a broken arm, and lot of asthmatics and kids with upper respiratory infections.....

Neither of us expected to inherit the medical care of 7000+ OVCs, but God is more than enough as we begin to walk in the role God has for us here. Excited for more clinics this week!!!

***I am SO SORRY, but my pictures won't upload....and it is time to go...I will keep trying, I can't wait to show pictures of the kids and the clinic! We also got to help out while we were passing out Samaritan's Purse Christmas boxes!! It was such a blessing to be on the other side of it! I have lots of pictures of that, too...so, hope you all are doing well. Love you all!!!

Trying to Catch Up!!

I have SO much to tell you all!!! I am blogging as fast as I can now that I have internet!! So, keep checking back because I know I won't be able to get too far before I have to go, so I will be putting more up throughout this week!

Can't wait to share it with yall!!

Mozi Pics

Nat and I at Som do Ceu in Maputo!!!!!



Jordan preaching (and totally rockin the EPIC shirt!!!!) and Isaac interpreting...dude brought a strong word from God, def. connected and God really worked through His testimony!



My roomies and I getting excited Pre-Mozi



These people totally know how to dance! The excitement here at youth was INSANE! Loved it! It was incredible to worship with these youth in Moz! God was there and it was AWESOME!!!

Missionary Retreat

We had a staff retreat last week (THANK YOU OHLERKINGS!!!!) to Xia Xia in Moz. What a blessing!! It was incredible to hear what God has done through Children's Cup this past year and look ahead to what God will be doing this next year! It was such a blessing to just hang out and build on the relationships God has already given me here.

About a year and a half ago (before anything with Africa came up...), I remember praying and telling God I was trusting Him with these relationships in my life and I was just laying them at the alter...so, eventually, He took me up on this and had me move away from what I've known my whole life....And God is SO FAITHFUL!!!! God has been so true to Matthew 19:29!!!! (And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life.)

So, I miss everyone at home! I love you all! I love hearing from you! But God has given me such a precious blessing in the relationship I have here!

Hello!!

I have been trying to upload pictures for FOREVER and I think I am finally getting somewhere....so, to start....here is a lovely pic taken from our back porch. Apparently, someone thought it was a good idea to burn the fields when there is a wind storm....?????

Eish!

I am so sorry about the lack of posts!!! I have terrible timing when it comes to wanting to post and the internet not working....Seriously, I get to church early to send emails and the internet is down...an hour later, it works, but by the time I type out my blog post...you guessed it, the internet is down again. Something to get used to...Unfortuantly, I am about to leave to Mozambique for the week and won't have internet. But I can't wait to fill you in with what God has been doing here and how He is rockin my world.

Love hearing from y'all! Looking forward to sharing more with you!

For those of you who were wondering...

I finally have my phone, which is a huge blessing. My number is 011.268.602.5616. If you want to call, I suggest you get an online calling card so it is cheaper for you (incoming calls are free for me).

Hope you all have a wonderful Monday!

Got smoked by the Holy Ghost

Jordan was talking to the youth leadership team last night about being real servant leaders and sharing how that is really the most important and how we need to be loving & serving people.

After our meeting, Zomba, one of the young adults, said she wanted to serve and asked if she could clean the toliets at the church. Yeah.....the toilets. Talk about taking it to heart. Seriously, who asks to do that? I mean, I might volunteer to make copies or clean the kitchen or help tear down, but the TOILETS?!

God, give me a humble, completely willing, servants heart like Zomba.

Feeling African

I am becoming more and more comfortable with life here...sportin the long skirt and got to walk to Spar (the grocery store) from work. My Swazi coworkers joked that once I could walk back with it on my head instead of holding it all, I would be a real African woman.

I think that is going to take a little longer than becoming comfortable at Spar....

What I am doing here

So......most of you all know that a lot of what I am going to be doing here wasn't very completely defined before I got here. For now (flexiblity is KEY in missions :) is working with the medical side of things here, which I am really excited about. It will put me out with the Carepoint kids a ton, which I am super pumped about. One of the 'Cup staff got accepted to university, so essentially, I will be talking over his role in the pharmacy, medical inventory, getting the kids ready to see Jessie ('Cup's new nurse/my roommate) by getting vitals & noting symptoms, and with medical records. Anyway, I just wanted to give you all that update and look forward to updating you with how it is going and also how I will be serving in youth......

Thoughts to ponder....

One morning Natalie asked if I had seen our (well, the guys and Sandra's) pet chicken, Victoria...which I had not yet. But it was making really loud, really un-chicken like noises –totally not normal - but Victoria had come into our house and was chillin under our table. Yeah, TIA, huh?

The shoe store here has a 12/24/36 month payment plan....FOR SHOES. Isn't that crazy? It is really sad that people are so poor, they cannot even afford straight out buy shoes.

Totally armed with mace now, so it you try to bother me - watch out.....just kidding...kind of. But really, we joke that if we were to die in Swaziland, it would be from crossing the street and getting hit by a car. Because they drive on the other side of the rode..."left, right, left" doesn't cut it. You don't think it is that hard, but your natural instinct is much more strong than one would think....trust me.

So many things here are "same, but different". Whenever you I ask if they have something, they are like, "sure" but then follow it by a 5 minute explanation of how it is so different here.

Our office part security guard, Promise, totally cracks me up! He is actually inside our office 95% of the time I am there. I guess if you security guard is going to be hanging out, at least it is in the same office we are in.

White tile floor…in Africa…who thought this was a good idea…??? I think it makes as much sense as our upstairs "balcony"…the one with sliding glass doors that you can walk out onto, oh wait...there is no floor to walk out on…

Getting used to converting everything in my head...dollars to Rand, Fahrenheit to Celsius, Miles to Kilometers, Pounds to Kg...Trying to branch out and use more SiSwati, but some have said I should stick to multiplication and work on my conversations until I get a bit quicker.

The 'Cup staff is AWESOME, AWESOME, AWESOME! I got to work with Nomty and KB a bit today and talk with Gugu and Zinty and love them! They are so cool, have such a joy and light - it is amazing. They are so fun....thank you Jesus for this blessing.

Sometimes I would get frustrated because people thing they have a pretty good handle on what Africa is like - based off the movies and evening news - and usually they are totally selling Africa short. It is such a vibrant, breathtaking place. Sometimes it is so easy to love it here....other times, it feels like "Wow, I'm totally in a 3rd world country"....when you see all the AMICAAL, WHO, and UN vehicles you remember you are in a "developing nation" that according to many, is going up in flames.

Thank you Jesus that we are not bound by what is seen in the natural...

Pictures!

Ok.....so hopefully this worked....Still getting used to the internet here :) And trying to take pictures of yourself and a bunch of kids.....

Sorry!

Ok....so I guess I have learned not to promise to email or blog on certain days....seeing how it is usually those days that the internet isn't working.....I have pictures to upload, but uploading them isn't working so well. Hopefully I will have them up soon....

Thank You!

I just have a second, but I wanted to say THANK YOU! For all the comments, messages, and email you all have sent - keep them coming! They make me feel so loved! I appreciate them all so much....thanks for the encouragement and I will post again soon (hopefully Thursday!).

And so it begins....

I was waiting to leave church this Sunday, when I got this awesome opportunity!! I was SO EXCITED...ok, and a bit nervous because I had absolutely no idea what I was going to do/say/or pray....but God is so gracious.

Anyway, Jordan is one of the missionaries from the US that is serving here and one of his responsibilities is as the Youth Pastor of HPC. But, they haven't really had any women serving in Youth yet, so it has limited his ability to really minister to some of the girls.....

So, there was this girl as church - 14 yrs old - and Jordan saw her pretty much strung out on drugs the night before and she was waiting to talk to us after service. So Jordan started to ask if everything was ok with her, how things were at home, did she want to tell us anything...it was crazy - I knew she was so close to just saying it, but she kept looking away. But we said if she ever needed anything or wanted to talk, we were there for her.

Then I asked Jordan if I could pray alone with her and when I asked her if there was anything in specific that I could pray for, she started to cry and said she is starting to have these dreams - nightmares, rather - of something that happened to her years ago. I imagined she is part of the 80% of Swazi women that have been sexually abused. But she went on to describe a little bit of how that made her feel and what she was dealing with. Pretty much the most amazing blessing and opportunity to be able to pray with her, such an honor. After she gave me the biggest hug I have ever gotten - I have never had anyone hug me that hard (yes, even after all those goodbyes back at home!). Obviously, I can't wait to build a relationship with her and the rest of the youth! I know this was just a glimpse of what is to come!! And I CANNOT WAIT TO DO MORE OF THIS!!!!!! I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!

Weekend Services & This Next Week

I was so excited to be at Healing Place Church Swaziland this weekend! God is already doing some amazing things at this new church plant! They are about three months old and this past weekend was their biggest service with the exception of their launch weekend - which is HUGE! They had awesome worship - both English and SiSwati songs - and then Ps. Ben preached a strong message on serving, gearing up for Servolution this next weekend!

I got to jump in and help one of the 'Cup interns from Zimbabwe, Karl, in Kid's Church. He did an awesome illustrated sermon and gave an alter call. God is really working in all the lives here.

But I am really pumped to start diving into some ministry here. We have a discipleship class on Thursday night for the church - helping people build that deeper relationship. Friday is Youth Group and the 16th the church is doing Servolution.....a day for the church to come together and reach out and serve their communities! I'll let you all know how it goes....

So far.....

So, crazy to be back! So much to say....

Arrived safely, awesome plane ride - slept the whole way over. All my luggage made it (Thank you God!!) and everything that I packed was still in there by the time I made it here. And everything that exploded in my bag was in a Zip-lock bag, so all is well :)

Love the house I am staying at - such a blessing! I will be rooming with another missionary arriving on Thursday, so I can't wait to meet Jessie!! But Sandra and Natalie also live in the house.

A lot of this weekend was beginning to get used to a different culture and country....New grocery stores - different food, different sides of the rode, different cultural norms....I just seem to switch back and forth from "this isn't that different" to "it's okay, I'll get used to this". It is funny to be at the grocery and get so excited to recognize a brand from back home.

Besides that....it is officially freezing!!! We are coming out of a mild winter, but I am still constantly cold. Wool socks, slippers, space heaters, and hot tea is the way to go, but just something to get accustomed to :)

Greetings from Swaziland!!!!

Hello!

I am so excited to be here!! I know some of you all wanted my address, so here it is:

P.O. Box A527
Swazi Plaza
Mbabane, Swaziland, AFRICA

Make sure you put Swaziland and Africa or else it might end up in Switzerland :)

I don't know my number yet, but as soon as I do, I will post it!!! Can't wait to talk to you all back at home.

Also, for those who were wondering, I will be keeping my Bayside email address, so you can reach me there.

In South Africa

You know you aren't a very good blogger when you are leaving for Swaziland for a year and don't post when you are heading out.......

So, for those who didn't know, I left yesterday on the 7th and am about to board my plane to fly into Swaziland. Can't wait to keep you updated! Love you all and can't wait to hear from you (I still have my Bayside email.......).

Love Y'all!

40 Days of Prayer Starts TOMORROW

Don't forget, 40 Days of Prayer starts TOMORROW! Sign up and check it out here: http://www.childrenscup.org/v2/fortydays/

Blog to check out

I love reading Mr. Dave Ohlerking's blog! I know looking back on life, I want to be able to share stories like him!

In the past month, he has talked about personal experiences in the Philippines, Liberia, the US, Zimbabwe, Israel, Vietnam, Peru, Belgium, Ethiopia, Honduras, France, Italy, El Salvador, Kenya, the Ivory Coast, Laos, Chile, Taiwan, China, Brazil, Cambodia, the Democratic Republic of Congo, and Kenya.

Why? Cause it's about Jesus! Check it out at: http://daveohlerking.blogspot.com/

And I can't forget his bride of almost 50 year, Mrs. Jean, who faithfully served with him all these years!

I offer devotion

I am loving this song right now. When life seems overwhelming, this song is such a powerful reminder.

I have nothing more than all You offer me
There is nothing else that’s of worth to me

You are all that want. You're all I need

And I love You Lord

You are all that I want

I offer devotion, I offer devotion....

Too often I forget that that is all He wants...just my devotion. I don't have to come with answers or strength or talent. None of that matters to Him - He just wants our devotion.

Does not disappoint

...but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us...

Mondays

Gotta love Mondays! (Or whatever your day off is...) Went up to PF Chang's and International Plaza & spent some quality time with my newly engaged best friend, soon-to-be Mrs. Walker.

The End is Near....

Although I will be working weekends until I leave, I am only scheduled to come to the office for 2 more days...totally hasn't hit me yet!

God, What Else?

As I pulled up to church this afternoon, I just burst into tears. I was just thinking, "God I am not ready for this, not today, not right now". I guess I am just learning more about brokenness. I knew God was just taking me up on a commitment I made to Him. It was all of 15 minutes at work before I got a message that at the very least, made me so frustrated. I took a moment to take a walk around the church, thinking "God, I can't do this. Today is the wrong day for this". He reminded me of what Perry Noble says in his sermon: we should be saying "God, what else? What else do you want to do in me?"

...I never want comfort to be the barrier from what I am to what God wants to accomplish in me. Today was a huge reminder to have the heart of "God, what else?"

Happy Fourth!

So thankful for a day off to chill, hang with the parents & then all meet up with Kristen and Kaycee for 45 minutes of fireworks! Definitely one of my favorite things!

God Loves the Rapist

God loves the Rapist just as much as He loves the Raped.

When I saw that on the Young's blog a couple of years ago, I knew they were right, but I tried to ignore God's conviction of my judgemental spirit.

Last year, I was in a research methods class and was assigned to go watch my prof. give her expert testimony in a capitol case. The case was all over the news...a man killed his grandfather, parents and brother on Thanksgiving. I remember sitting in the courtroom, waiting for the defendant to arrive, thinking "how could this guy do this to his family?"

I heard the clink of his shackles as he walked all the way down the outside hallway and watched as the photographers scrambled to take his picture as he appeared in the courtroom. But the moment I saw his face, everything changed. I related to him. We were both in need of a Savior's grace...and both equally loved by him.

It look a while to resolve those feelings, for I was not expecting them. But I was very much convicted. I loved those that are easy to love. It isn't that hard to love on the family whose child was diagnosed with cancer, but am I loving the prostitute or crack addict on 14th? It will be easy to love the child whose body is riddled by AIDS and has no one else to love her, value her... but will I demonstrate the Savior's love to the man that infected that precious child?

"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." John 13:34-35

EPIC Worship

Click here to go to iTunes and buy it....AMAZING worship. You will definitely not regret it!

Full of Grace and Truth

A lesson I have been learning....

John 1 says Jesus was full of grace and truth. He was the perfect combination of both. Grace means I'll love you no matter what. Truth means I'll be honest no matter what. Grace without truth is a relationship with no backbone. Truth without grace is a relationship with no heart. But when you combine grace and truth, you've got the catalyst for growth.

All of us need someone in our lives that can get in our face and speak the truth in love. It's the only way we'll grow past our spiritual blind spots. It goes by lots of different names, but Scripture tells us to rebuke, reprove, correct, and exhort one another. It is one of the least practiced spiritual disciplines....

(Written by Mark Batterson...check out the related sermon here)

A Tale of Three Kings

I read "A Tale of Three Kings: A Study in Brokenness" last week and really gained a lot from it. Such a cool look at Saul, David, and Absalom. Here are some excerpt that really hit me:

"Better he kill me than I learn his ways. Better he kill me than I become as he is. I shall not practice the ways that cause kings to go mad. I will not throw spears, not will I allow hatred to grow in my heart. I will not avenge. I will not destroy the Lord's anointed. Not now. Not ever!"...David in response to Joab's questioning about his lack of defense with King Saul.

Hmmm...how many times have I forgotten that the "Sauls" in my life might be appointed by God....

Later, King David responds to Abishai regarding his lack to defense against Absalom...."And if I stop him, will I still be a David? If I stop him, will I not be a Saul?...To stop him, I must become either a Saul or an Absalom."

This book reminded me of how much I love David. I love the purity of heart he displays...no hidden agenda - just surrendered to however God wants to use him.

Good book, y'all should read it. It's really short, definitely worth the 1-2 hours it takes to read.

What I've Learned

Having worked with the production team @ Bayside the past few years, here are some things I have learned along the way.....

Notice DETAILS...everything says something. 1% of what you do will make 99% of the difference.

“Competitive excellence requires 100 percent all of the time. If you doubt that, try maintaining excellence by setting your standards at 92 percent. Or even 95 percent. People figure they’re doing fine so long as they get somewhere near it. Excellence gets reduced to the acceptable, and before long, acceptable doesn’t seem worth the sweat if you can get by with adequate. After that, mediocrity is only a breath away.” - Chuck Swindoll

Excellence isn't perfection...it's doing the best you can with what you have.

It's a team effort. When you help others win, you also win. (Maxwell)

It's about the people.....not the task. Don't ever forget that.

...And for all you task oriented people (like me...), check out "25 Ways to Win with People" by John Maxwell and Les Parrott. Loved it!

The Weekend Services

This past week was just one of those weeks...last Sunday night I was painfully aware of my lack of margin and balance in my life, but I feel like my week went downhill from there. Yikes!

And this weekend was rough...the production of One Prayer is proving to be quite the task...





...So on Thursday, the production, A/V, and worship team got together and ran through the finer points of the service. Unfortunately, after some challenges during our Saturday night services, we were at the office till after midnight trying to come up with solutions....with our incredible video guy pulling an all-nighter....

But by 1st service, I had my breakfast of champions, and we were all ready to go at it again...

Ps. Craig Groeschel's message was strong and God really showed up! But after services, I think we were all exhausted.



Duane and our computer...and the ghetto-rigged backup computers....

I need to say, I serve with such an awesome team. I have had the privilege of working with this team of people the past few years now and am incredible honored to have them in my life. They work so hard and with such excellence. I'll miss you guys; love y'all!

It's That Time!

I am so excited about this!! Children's Cup annual 40 Days of Prayer is beginning soon! You all don't want to miss this! It starts August 1st and goes through September 9th. Make sure you check out the 40 Days of Prayer website and don't forget to sign up by emailing: pray at childrenscup dot org.


Also, I have ordered some prayer guides, so let me know if you would like to have some!!

Courage

Without fear there cannot be courage.

(Thanks for the quote, Dan)

What I am really worried about

If I am scared of anything having to do Swaziland, I think it will be things like this...

(I got this from one of Becca's (Kristen's friend) blog entries. Read the entire post here.)

“Becca, I hate to tell you this but one of your girls just dropped out of school, she’s pregnant”…”The girl you have been ministering to, she was out of school last week, we sent her home because she was possessed by a demon”…”There’s no Bible at home, my parents only refer to the ancestors”…”Dear Becca, please help, I’m HIV positive” …” The women keep coming to me from the community asking for food and I don’t have any, I don’t know what to do”…”Hello, my name is Lindiwe. My parents are not working, my mother is sick. My older brother was paying for my school fees and he just lost his job. Can you help?”…”You see the teacher that just walked by, she recently gave birth to twins, and one of them just died”… ”Did I tell you about my sister-in-law? She went to the doctor and they told her the baby died inside of her.”…”I can’t believe what happened to pastor…he was put in the isolation room in the mental ward”...“Two students parents just died, they have no one. The money from government went to relatives who took the money for themselves. Yes, government pays for their school fees but who pays for food? For soap to wash themselves and their clothes?”

When is it too much? All but one of these phrases I’ve heard in the last 24 hours, the other in the last week.

How do you handle hearing all that in one day....day after day?

Please pray for the people of Swaziland.

Totally Wii Domination

I did kick some Wii booty in tennis...I have to admit, she beat me in bowling...but I didn't throw the ball behind me or fall, so I did better than real life bowling :)

But I was horrendous in golfing...at 8 over par, it made me forfeit I was so bad...I think I will stick to the real sport...

Pepe

(I stole this from Christy's blog)



This is a picture Pepe and Trinity. Pepe, on the left, is a 12 year old child that we have served as Children's Cup for years. Trinity, on the right, is the 4 year old daughter of our directors, Ben and Susan.

Too Emotional

We had some family friends over tonight to share with them about Children's Cup and my commitment and can I say that I about lost it! Once I saw the Young's get emotional, it was over....there was no recovering :)

I want to be in Swaziland so bad right now...my heart is so broken for the people there...the depth of darkness and opportunity for hope.

When I think about Swaziland, these are usually the 2 faces that flash in my mind....

The boy is my arms was so precious. I was playing with some kids and he can up to me and said his tummy hurt and asked if I would hold him. He held so tightly and I squeezed back, then asked him if he felt better. He said it did - I about lost it then, too. Needless to say, he was in my arms many times after that.

The little boy standing is one of the hardest things...his eyes were so empty and even still, that falls a thousand words short to describe this broken spirit. I have picture after picture of him just standing there with that blank stare. By the last day at Zombodze, he finally let me hold him. As time went on his body moved from rigid and tense to a bit more relaxed, a bit softer. God, what happened to this child to make him this way?

Ouch!

In the book "The Irresistible Revolution" by Shane Claiborne, it has this quote by Rich Mullins...

"You guys are all into that born again thing, which is great. We do need to be born again, since Jesus said that to a guy named Nicodemus. But if you tell me I have to be born again to enter the kingdom of God, I can tell you that you have to sell everything you have and give it to the poor, because Jesus said that to one guy too...[And he paused in the awkward silence.] But I guess that's why God invented highlighters, so we can highlight the parts we like and ignore the rest!" (pg.98)

I love this...I really makes me think, you know? What else do we choose not to highlight in the Bible?

Book of Hope

Today I got to sit in some meetings with Book of Hope and our missions pastor (my boss). First, I have to say I have the greatest boss, because I never would have had the opportunity to attend those meetings if he hadn't invited me to be there...I so appreciate they way he shows value to the people he works with.

I love Book of Hope's missions statement: "God's Word. Every Child."
They are a phenomenal organization and as Bayside continues to partner with them, I know they will continue to make a dynamic impact on the Kingdom.

Click here to see a video they did on Swaziland called Truth and Shadows. It is really good...it explains some of Swazi's cultural mindsets. It makes me want to be in Swaziland so desperately and I cry every time I watch it.

Last year alone, they distributed 100,000 Books of Hope within Swaziland....that is 10% of their entire population. Awesome!

**FYI to all the Baysiders: We are taking a mission trip with Book of Hope to Columbia in late February...watch out for more info on this and other Book of Hope trips. Also, there are a few spots left for our Children's Cup trip to Swaziland in October. I would love to see you out there, so email me for more info**

What I am Reading

I am one of those that read multiple books at a time. Not sure if that’s good or not…but here is what’s on the list right now:

The Making of a Leader. Pastor Matt Keller recommended this one. Not so much a quick, easy read, but great material.

Love and Respect. I am on the last chapter and think everyone should read this book…Even if you knew you were never getting married, you still stand to gain something from this book. And thanks to Matt and Michelle for advising me to read it.

They Call me Pastor; How to Love the Ones You Lead. Charles suggested this one. The subtitle explains it well; great book & easy to read.

Leaders are Readers

I went back to the basics tonight and read through Leadership 101, by John Maxwell. Here are some points I gleaned, strong principles and quotes I like:

To be conscious that you are ignorant of the facts is a great step to knowledge.

Successful leaders are learners. And the learning process is ongoing. A result of self-discipline and perseverance.

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”...always loved this one by Theodore Roosevelt

The Law of the Lid

The 20/80 Principle

There are three qualities a leader must exemplify to build trust: competence, connection, and character.

When a leader’s character is strong, people trust him. And they trust in his ability to release their potential.

True leadership cannot be awarded, appointed, or assigned. It comes only from influence.

You can love people without leading them, but you cannot lead people without loving them.

Everyone wants to feel that he counts for something and is important to someone. Invariably, people will give their love, respect, and attention to the person who fills that need.

What transpired

It started with the lyrics below, but here is what came of it.....

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me

Break my heart for what is yours
Everything I am for your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity

It just makes me think what really breaks God's heart. Do we allow our hearts to break? Do they break for the same things that break God's heart? Sometimes I wonder if Jesus would recognize us as Christians by our actions if He was walking among us....

Then I wonder how I will react in a culture so different from mine. Where everything seems so backwards...radically different mindsets and values...no justice.

Then I was watching this documentary on Swaziland and I am just sitting there thinking how do you live in a society like this? When the problem is so massive, so destructive - how do you continue to operate in that? Then it showed this young man, still in high school - a leader at his school, and he went with one of the Heart for Africa missionaries to go get tested. They showed the woman doing the pre-test counseling and she asked him, "How many partners have you had?", "Do you know their status?", "Would you commit suicide if you were positive?" It broke my heart to see that! I couldn't imagine what it is like...to wait and see if you have been handed a death sentence. You can see how scared he is...terrified that his future has been spoken for due to AIDS. After some waiting, he goes back in and gets his status...he was negative. To see his reaction - the hope for a future, one of influence and leadership for his peers; I just sat there thinking "It is about the one. That is why we do what we do."

Last thought: Why we continue to have faith and press in to see God move in this country: Romans 4:17 says that God calls those things that are not as though they are. Love it!

In Swaziland: 88% of 15 year-old boys will be dead by 2015

That is just 7 years away...

All up in the flesh

This whole week, I have been really anticipating our First Wednesday service at Bayside - just excited about how God was going to move. So, of course, whenever you exhibit that attitude, Satan tries whatever it takes to get you out of that spirit, and all up in the flesh! So, this is what he tried to use this time.....

Talk about a traffic accident. (Side note: The most amazing thing is that there were no fatalities [the driver was badly burned, so pray for him!])

But basically, a tanker fell off I-75 and burst into flames. That means I-75 is closed. So, my 15 minute drive ended up as 1 hour and 15 minutes. As a service coordinator....it isn't such a good idea to show up an hour late :) The whole time I was sitting in the traffic, I was fighting it. I was getting so annoyed and impatient and then it was like a light bulb went off. Our midweek service did not depend on me - if I never made it there, it would be okay. But what did depend on me and whether I would really connect with God (like I had been so looking forward to) was my attitude. My negative attitude was changing nothing, but spending that time with God and just worshipping in my car -- that is what set me up to receive what God had for me at tonight's service. So next time I'm fighting the flesh, I pray this is what I medidate on:

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control....we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.

Oops...

I am sure you notice the tire mark on the driveway....I provided this lovely addition (and a few others...) during my 2nd driving lesson today. Ray was making me practice shifting from neutral to 1st - it was terrible. I take like 30 seconds to completely release the clutch and give it gas. I was getting faster until I stalled 6 times in a row at the end of the driveway...I was pretty frustrated, but Ray thought it was rather funny. I eventually made it to street and did much better there. Ray provides hysterical commentary, so it really was a lot of fun...but I have a ways to go :)

You Won't Relent

You won't relent until You have it all
My heart is Yours

I'll set You as a seal upon my heart
As a seal upon my arm
For there is love that is as strong as death
Jealousy demanding as the grave
Many waters cannot quench this love

You won't relent until You have it all
My heart is Yours

Come be the fire inside of me
Come be the flame upon my heart
Come be the fire inside of me
Until You and I are one

Why Missionaries Really Need Prayer...

This was posted earlier on Dave Ohlerking's blog:

Ben Rodgers, Children's Cup African Director, and I were driving into Harare, Zimbabwe. After we stopped at red light we got a flat tire. We didn't know a gang of robbers had stabbed the tire to stop us.We got out of the truck. Ben was crawling under it to drop the spare tire, I was directing traffic to keep them from running over Ben.Suddenly three thugs stole our brief cases out of the cab and took off in their car.A Zimbabwe businessman was in the car behind us and saw it all. He chased the thieves's car. Three blocks away it crashed into another car at an intersection. The police were right there at the scene and they recovered our bags which contained about $10,000 cash (banks don't work in Zimbabwe), passports and vehicle documents. Two of the robbers were in the back of a police truck. They were rather banged up, but they were lucid enough to let me tell thim I forgave them and God would, too, if they asked Him. One of them responded that he was doing that already.The Good Samaritan businessman urged me to get the bags from the police or they might keep them. After a verbal and physical tug-of-war I got the bags out of the policemen's hands and returned to our car. Ben and I got into our truck and for just a moment sat there in goosebumps--aware that we had just experienced a miracle--a real-time miracle!

What I am listening to...at least this week...

• Misty Edwards...Talk about anointed. Amazing! (Thanks Kristen!)
• Planetshakers...Fall in this Place, Rain Down, Healer
• John Larson...got the pre-release at the ARC conference...really like it.
• Paolo Nutini...picked up a free EP at a little bookstore. Soulful on Last Request and a sweet accent on These Streets. Doubt I would purchase the album, but not bad for free.
• And when it's raining, we got the Copeland/Coldplay/Sigur Ros rotation going on.

Passion & Purity

I love this book! Probably not for the same reasons most people do...because read it when I had gotten back and I felt about Swaziland the way Elisabeth felt about Jim. (Pretty melodramatic, I know). The sub-heading says, "Learning to Bring Your Love Life Under Christ's Control", but I think "Learning to Bring Your Life Under Christ's Control" would be just as accurate.

I really gained a lot from from chapter "Holding Pattern". Here are a few thoughts:

- I do know that waiting on God requires the willingness to bear uncertainty, to carry within oneself the unanswered question, lifting the heart to God about it whenever it intrudes upon one's thoughts.

- Steadfastness, that is holding on;
patience, that is holding back;
expectancy, that is holding the face up;
obedience, that is holding one's self in readiness to go or do;
listening, that is holding quiet and still to hear.

Oswald Chambers

I was rereading some stuff I highlighted in My Utmost for His Highest, so here are a couple of things that stood out...

- Are we prepared to let God do as He likes with us - prepared to be separated from conscious blessing?...God is never in a hurry; if we wait, we shall see that God is pointing out that we have not been interested in Himself but only in His blessings. The sense of God's blessing is elemental..."Be of good cheer, I have overcome the world." Spiritual grit is what we need.

-If once the burden and the pressure come upon us and we are not in the worshipping attitude, it will produce not only hardness toward God but dispare in our own souls. God continually introduces us to people for whom we have no affinity, and unless we are worshipping God, the most natural thing to do is to treat them heartlessly...A heartless Christian must be a terrible grief to Our Lord.

What I am SO thankful for

Jeremiah 32:27-
Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh; is there anything too hard for Me?

Children's Cup Kids Camp

I cannot wait to do ministry with these incredible people serving these precious children! Check out this video for a closer look at what the 'Cup is all about...

Wedding Bells, Memory Lane, and PFs

This past weekend we went up to Tallahassee to my cousin's wedding. It was great getting to see everyone, especially knowing it was the last time I will get to see most of them before I leave. We also went by and saw our old houses in Tallahassee and Gainesville - talk about a major trip down memory lane!

My brother, sister (who will kill me if she sees this pic) and I at the reception.

Then on our day off, Audrey and I got to hang out...complete with a trip to P.F. Changs. I am learning a lot about being intentional, especially in regards to relationships, but more on that later....

And as my fortune cookie from that night read: It is better to spend one hour with a best friend, than all day with ten others :)

FL Drivers - Watch Out!

I am officially learning how to drive stick shift. My 17 year old brother has kindly offered to be my driving instructor. He really does a great job, but I think there might be some ulterior motives of wanting to see his older sister stall all the way down the driveway (j/k...I wasn't that bad...).

Never the less, it was really fun, but I have some work to do :)

Next Level and Examined Experience

Last Thursday I had the opportunity to meet with Pastor Matt Keller, down in Ft. Myers. He is the lead pastor of Next Level Church, which just celebrated their 6th Anniversary this past weekend. Pastor Matt has been an incredible friend of Bayside and I have had the privilege of working with him whenever he comes up to speak at Bayside.

While meeting with him, he said that in life it is not the experience that counts, but the examined experience. So often I have heard that it is the experience in life that counts, but not many people focus on the examined part of that….

So here is my most current examination of recent experiences: The need for the armor of God could not be overstate. I am really learning the value of the shield of faith! It is a must have for anyone wanting to advance the Kingdom – you are never going to be useful unless you are engaging in the fight and you can’t do that unprotected. The past week, I have really felt the jolt of those attacks – I know I’m having to use my shield. I also know that if I become lackadaisical and don’t put on the armor of God, or use that shield, then will have to stop and tend to the wounds I have received in battle. I just don’t want the game of life to end and suddenly realize I was playing defense. I want to be intentional about playing offense.

Faith Without Deeds is Dead

Love these lyrics from Brook Fraser:
Now that I have seen
I am responsible
Faith without deeds is dead
Now that I have held you
In my own arms
I cannot let go till you are...
(to hear the song/see the video, check out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGx-xU6TnU8)

I get so energized when I see the body of Christ in action. I love that the 'Cup really lives out Ps 82: 3,4 (Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked.)

Check out this video of Children's Cup doing just that. Love it!!

Teachability

To really be teachable, you have to be willing to re-learn that which you think you already know.

-From Pastor Matt Keller's breakout session at the ARC All Access conference.

Faces I Miss

Sermon Notes

I was listening to the NCC podcast today & Pastor Mark Batterson had preached on leadership a few weeks back. It is out of 1 Tim. 3...there was supposed to be 17 points, but he ran out of time :)

1 Timothy 3
1. Above Reproach. – With great power comes great responsibility. Leaders play by different rules. Live to a higher standard…everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial. Trend to the beneficial side.
2. Husband of but one wife. Be faithful, prioritize that relationship.
a. Marriage/children can work to confront our selfishness. Creates a situation for God to really refine us.
3. Temperate. Calm and collected. How do you react in a stressful situation? When you are being squeezed, what comes out?
4. Self Controlled. -> Self leadership. How can you lead others if you can’t lead yourself?
5. Respectable. Earning the respect of others. Takes a lifetime to gain and a second to lose. Who respects you the most? Is it the people closest to you?
6. Hospitable. Warm & open. Treating people as if they were Jesus.
7. Able to teach. Best way to learn is to teach!
a. Leadership: Someone who produces more then they consume. Consume, consume, consume all you can – just produce more then you consume.
b. It isn’t so much ability to teach, but teachability
8. Not given to drunkenness. Leaders have tremendous responsibility, honor that and act carefully. Run from the fine line.
9. Not violent, but gentle. Have thick skin and a soft heart. Learn when to relax justice and introduce mercy.


I came across their core values a while back...definitely some values we can all apply personally:
1. Expect the unexpected
2. Irrelevance is irreverence
3. Love people when they least expect it and least deserve it
4. Playing it safe is risky
5. Pray like it depends on God and work like it depends on you
6. Everyone is invaluable and irreplaceable
7. Everything is an experiment
8. You cannot out give God
9. Maturity does not equal conformity
10. Go the extra mile
11. It's never too late to be who you might have been
12. Do it right and do it big

Lion Chaser's Manifesto

Quit living as if the purpose of life is to arrive safely at death. Set God-sized goals. Pursue God-ordained passions. Go after a dream that is destined to fail without divine intervention. Keep asking questions. Keep making mistakes. Keep seeking God. Stop pointing out problems and become part of the solution. Stop repeating the past and start creating the future. Stop playing it safe and start taking risks. Expand your horizons. Accumulate experiences. Enjoy the journey. Find every excuse you can to celebrate everything you can. Live like today is the first day and last day of your life. Don't let what's wrong with you keep you from worshiping what's right with God. Burn sinful bridges. Blaze a new trail. Criticize by creating. Worry less about what people think and more about what God thinks. Don't try to be who you're not. Be yourself. Laugh at yourself. Quit holding out. Quit holding back. Quit running away.Chase the lion

What I am listening to...

I used the last of my iTunes gift card on We Cry Out, recorded live from the Jesus Culture Conference. Some awesome worship. Check out this video:

Prayer

Today I was sharing with a friend what I wrote about praying yesterday and how I need to be more intentional about just spending time in prayer - seeking Him, hearing His heart - and she told me that later that night she was going to this night of prayer and asked if I wanted to come. Isn't God cool?

I am so blessed by the relationships I have in my life where I can just be honest about what I going on or what I need to work on. And it is so awesome to me that God knew this is an area I want to work on and how He just provided a perfect opportunity for me to just get alone with Him to just talk! What a perfect way to start the weekend!

Youth in Swaziland

Y'all have GOT to watch this video! It is a recap of the CarePoint youth going out and serving their community and then coming together and worshipping. These kid's hearts are just what gets me so excited! Even though they are in such need, they are really exhibiting the heart of their Father - loving others. They are choosing to say, "It's not about me; it's about knowing Him and making Him known!" I love that! They are standing up and leading in their communities - being an example of the hope and purpose we have in Christ! I can't wait to be able to serve with these awesome youth!

And for all those from the 'Cup that work so hard to pour into these youth and organize events like this - y'all are doing such a phenomenal job! I am so honored that I have the opportunity to work along side you.

Make sure you check out the video:

Eleanor Roosevelt says:

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing you think you cannot do.

31:12

She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. Proverbs 31:12

I love this verse! Its from Prov. 31, talking about the wife of noble character and I love how it says "all the days of her life". Not just the days they were married...or engaged...or dating...but all the days. A little verse that has had a lot to do with why I haven't dated. (Not saying that its wrong or that I wouldn't, but I just never felt like it would be bringing him good, and not harm...). But back to the point of this post:

I had never heard anyone preach or talk on the subject until I heard Kerri Weems (from Celebration Church, Jax) this week who had spoken on it in a sermon series call "She does him only good..." It takes the broader view of the men in your life - whether friends, coworkers, or husbands and how to do what v. 12 challenges. I thought it was really good stuff, so here are my notes:

Genesis 2: It is not good for man to be alone.
Men and women were both needed to complete the fullness of God.
Why? God is relational. God also designed us to be drawn to purpose, so we need to get good at working with them.

Prov. 31:10-12 says we need to be virtuous women. Virtuous meaning: having strength, might, efficiency, and wealth [of resources]. Women of God need to be a force of only good in the lives of the men we know.

What we need to remember:
1.) All men are sons/potential sons of God.
God is crazy about His boys. He LOVES them! He has big dreams for them! God wants us to steward and treat them well with patience, love, honor and comfort.

2.) Women are not men.
The man/man dynamic is very different from the man/woman dynamic. I won't bring to the table the same thing as a man, but something different and valuable. We bring our own strengths, including encouragement, comfort and a "can do" solution-oriented attitude.

3.) Men are not women.
The men in your life are not the male version of your best friend. Deal with them directly - they don't read between the lines.

4.) Men are not your source of significance. God is.

5.) Remember the power of affirmation.
No human spirit thrives on nagging, criticism, belittling or disrespect. Be their biggest fan. Celebrate their accomplishment.

One Week & Prayer

I have been done with school now for a week. It took until about day 2 for it to feel awkward. I felt like it was the end of school break and you are getting ready to go back and you realize you have done absolutely nothing on your list and you feel totally unproductive. (...maybe that's just me, but anyways...). I think it is because school really shaped so much of my life - my schedule, what I was learning, my goals, my deadlines - and suddenly its gone. I know I just have to be intentional about my time - seeking Jesus, spending time with my family and close friends, work and growing personally.

I also got convicted about prayer. I do ok with the "pray continually" throughout the day, but I really need to work on being purposeful and setting aside time for intercession!

Pictures

I realize I have been a bit of a slacker with not posting very many pictures, so, here's some random ones to try & make up:

Dad, Mom, brother (Ray), sister (Ann), Mimi, me, and Granny at my sister's graduation from USF. So, if you ever bust up in the ER in FL, you better hope she's your nurse ;)









View from school library (no wonder I liked it so much, huh?)












Old school Florida:













Our little baby, Sarge, trying to eat icicles off the trees. Isn't he cute!?













My sister's baby, Eddie:













The kids after Christmas Eve services:

I'm finished!!!

I'm done, I'm done, I'm done!!! I just finished my last exam! I have consumed exorbitant amounts of caffeine these past two weeks and have had very little sleep, but it was most definitely worth it!

Last week I had to turn in my development plan for Kenya and ran more numbers then I would ever care to (and I like math), but never really got it that way I wanted it. I think the closer it came to the deadline, the more unhappy I was with it. But the prof said it was a "model of clear narrative that shows great thoughtfulness went into each decision. 'A' "

God is faithful! And I am off to take a nap :)

And I think the beach is the PERFECT place to do so!!

Loving This!

Y'all have got to check out 1 Kings 18 - 19! There is so much good stuff in these two chapters! First, you have Elijah and the prophets of Baal. I love this part:

27 At noon Elijah began to taunt them. "Shout louder!" he said. "Surely he is a god! Perhaps he is deep in thought, or busy, or traveling. Maybe he is sleeping and must be awakened." 28 So they shouted louder and slashed themselves with swords and spears, as was their custom, until their blood flowed. 29 Midday passed, and they continued their frantic prophesying until the time for the evening sacrifice. But there was no response, no one answered, no one paid attention. 30 Then Elijah said to all the people, "Come here to me." They came to him, and he repaired the altar of the LORD, which was in ruins. 31 Elijah took twelve stones, one for each of the tribes descended from Jacob, to whom the word of the LORD had come, saying, "Your name shall be Israel." 32 With the stones he built an altar in the name of the LORD, and he dug a trench around it large enough to hold two seahs of seed. 33 He arranged the wood, cut the bull into pieces and laid it on the wood. Then he said to them, "Fill four large jars with water and pour it on the offering and on the wood." 34 "Do it again," he said, and they did it again. "Do it a third time," he ordered, and they did it the third time. 35 The water ran down around the altar and even filled the trench. 36 At the time of sacrifice, the prophet Elijah stepped forward and prayed: "O LORD, God of Abraham, Isaac and Israel, let it be known today that you are God in Israel and that I am your servant and have done all these things at your command. 37 Answer me, O LORD, answer me, so these people will know that you, O LORD, are God, and that you are turning their hearts back again." 38 Then the fire of the LORD fell and burned up the sacrifice, the wood, the stones and the soil, and also licked up the water in the trench. 39 When all the people saw this, they fell prostrate and cried, "The LORD -he is God! The LORD -he is God!"

Isn't that incredible?! Then he gets threatened....then runs....then this happens:

7 The angel of the LORD came back a second time and touched him and said, "Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you." 8 So he got up and ate and drank. Strengthened by that food, he traveled forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God. 9 There he went into a cave and spent the night. And the word of the LORD came to him: "What are you doing here, Elijah?"

He goes on to explain himself...and he has been very zealous for God and now they are trying to kill him. God asked him again in verse 13. This is huge! God came and said, "What are you doing here?" Has God whispered that to you before?....what are you doing here...And then we come up with some answer like Elijah and only to have God ask again, "What are you doing here?" So often I think we just go - or stay - without even thinking. And then when God questions, we have some answer that tries to justify why we are there. We stay because it's comfortable, or our family is here, it makes sense financially, our church is here, I have always been here - but have we even asked God why we are staying or going or do we just go, thinking our answers make sense, when in fact, we never really sought God in the whole situation...I got pretty convicted the first time I heard someone talk on these verses. I mean, Elijah had just in involved in some AMAZING works of God, but when he went on without seeking where to go first...well, I guess that is where a lot of us can relate to him. I would just encourage you to ask God "what am I doing here". Maybe you are exactly where God wants you, doing just what He wants you to do. But I think if we are honest, many of us (definitely including me) act before we ask.

Elijah was the only one who could call on God to send rains, and in chap 18, v 42 - 46, is on His knees praying. It says:

"Go and look toward the sea," he told his servant. And he went up and looked. "There is nothing there," he said. Seven times Elijah said, "Go back." 44 The seventh time the servant reported, "A cloud as small as a man's hand is rising from the sea." So Elijah said, "Go and tell Ahab, 'Hitch up your chariot and go down before the rain stops you.' " 45 Meanwhile, the sky grew black with clouds, the wind rose, a heavy rain came on..."

Elijah knew it was coming. He knew the rain might come the the 1st time he sent his servant, or the 7th, or the 107th, but He knew the power of God and trusted that. As I ask God "What am I doing here?" I want to walk in the same faith, so the glory of the Lord is displayed and the people will say, "The LORD -he is God! The LORD -he is God!"

The 'Rents

My dad took me to dinner on Tuesday night and we had so much fun! I am so blessed to have such an awesome mom and dad! Their support and guidance means the world to me. Love you guys!

Audrey

What is my best friend doing at 2:35 am? Making my support letters look AMAZING! That's devotion, huh?

She is the incredibly talented graphic designer here at Bayside and is graduating on Friday from the prestigious Ringling College of Art + Design. I was able to go to her Senior Portfolio Night last week and see all of her phenomenal designs birthed from all those late night/early mornings doing school work with me while supplying the iced chais and wholewheat blueberry Eggo's. What more could a girl ask for in a best friend?

Love You, girl!

One more to go!!

I had to take my immunology final online and figured I would do it Thursday, but since I was up, I went ahead a took it tonight/this morning. The final was a bit harder then the rest of the class because it really focused on the cellular responses, complement system, etc; the rest of the class had a good mix of the broader aspects (vaccinations, organ donation, disease + public perception, ethics, and the part large pharma companies play). I almost dropped the class when I opened the textbook - I was a bit intimidated. Glad I made it out :)

**After a post like that, I think all 2 people that read my blog may quit doing so. I promise I will talk about something beside school as soon as it's over.

Almost Done

As of now, I am about to take my 3rd final for my immunology class. The first two were easy enough, so hopefully, the trend will continue.

I have to say, when I went to class today for my final, it was pretty sad - well, I was pretty sad - as in fighting back tears; strange, I know. I know God is calling me to go to Swaziland now, but it was (and still can be) difficult to put school on the shelf, not knowing if, or when, I might go back. I have such a peace about moving, but it is not always easy leaving behind what is so comfortable to you. I have been in school every fall/spring/summer semester for the past four years. I worked hard and excelled in school. And I think that is what freaks me out. If I were to stay here, I could have everything worked out and under control. But walking in what God has for me requires an very uncomfortable amount of faith :) The only thing I know for sure is that I won't be able to make it on my own. I won't have it all figured out, or under control. I am leaving an environment that I know I can succeed in, to one filled with unknowns, while Satan keeps telling me that I have nothing to offer and that I am not qualified.

In a sense, I guess he is right...but I know I serve a God who is more than enough.

God of this City

You're the God of this City

You're the King of these people

You're the Lord of this nation

You areYou're the light in this darkness

You're the hope to the hopeless

You're the peace to the restless

You are

For there is no one like our God

There is no one like you God

For greater things have yet to come and greater things are still to be done in this city

God, break my heart for this city. Let my heart break for these people like Your heart breaks for them. Let me see them through Your eyes. God, break me, shape me, mold me - put me through the fire - refine me so You may work through me. Fulfill your purpose for me; do not abandon the work of Your hand.

Final Exams

This first one - Foundations of Maternal & Child Health - was the one I was worried about. It was a bit of a close call, but I got a 90.5%, for an "A" in the class. Yay! One down, three more to go.

Those whose hope is in Him

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD. -Lamentations 3:21-26

God is so faithful! Thinking back on when I was wrestling over whether or not to move to Swaziland (at this point I knew I was called...I was just deciding how much faith and trust I really had in God), but anyway, things that seemed like such a big deal, things that were causing my faith to really waiver and questions God's ability to take care of things - suddenly seem not so scary. Not that there aren't BIG things that need to happen in order for me to get to Swaziland, but I just have a wonderfully different perspective. I guess instead of big problems, they are just big opportunities for God to show up and show off His power and His glory. I just have to remember: The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him.

You know your a geek when...

....You admit to stealing your mother's peer reviewed medical journals out of the mail so you can read them before she gets to them....

....or when the first book of your summer reading list is "Creating a World Without Poverty: Social Business and the Future of Capitalism". I am pretty excited about this one :) I read Muhammad Yunus' book "Banker to the Poor" over a year ago and loved it - the man is pretty brilliant.

Here is what Publishers Weekly has to say about it: Economics professor Yunus claims he originally became involved in the poverty issue not as a policy-maker, scholar, or researcher, but because poverty was all around me. With these words he stopped teaching elegant theories and began lending small amounts of money, $40 or less, without collateral, to the poorest women in the world. Thirty-three years later, the Grameen Bank has helped seven million people live better lives building businesses to serve the poor. The bank is solidly profitable, with a 98.6% repayment rate. It inspired the micro-credit movement, which has helped 100 million of the poorest people in the world escape poverty and earned Yunus (Banker to the Poor) a Nobel Peace prize. This volume efficiently recounts the story of microcredit, then discusses Social Business, organizations designed to help people while turning profits. French food giant Danone's partnership to market yogurt in Bangladesh is described in detail, along with 25 other businesses that operate under the Grameen banner. Infused with entrepreneurial spirit and the excitement of a worthy challenge, this book is the opposite of pessimistic recitals of intractable poverty's horrors.

My trip to Swaziland

Six months ago this week, I came back from a 10-day trip to Swaziland. One year ago, I hadn't really considering going on this trip. God's plan was a little different...I ended up helping lead that amazing group, knew God was calling me back, and am now moving to Swaziland!!!! So, I though I would post a few pictures from the incredible Bayside mission trip in October 2007....

After missing our plane, getting stuck in Joburg, and spending the night in the airport prayer room, I was a bit excited to finally be on our way to Swaziland.






It was as we were landing in Swaziland that I knew God was calling me to serve there. And God just continued to impress that upon my heart for the rest of the trip.





I know you aren't supposed to have favorites, but the little boy I'm holding won my heart. The other little boy broke my heart - he wore the same expression-less look on his face the entire time. It makes you think what happened in his short life to take the emotion, much less joy, out of this little precious little boy's life.





Chillin' with the kids at the Zombodze CarePoint. One of them finished eating, lean over, and made a....farting noise by blowing on my elbow. The rest of the kids

thought it was a grand idea and joined in :D





The lions in search of the Tavelocity gnome that escaped from our truck...












At the camp that they held for some of the youth; this was such an awesome time to get to connect with them and just hear their hopes and dreams.







I (obviously) was having a bit of trouble getting the hang of jump rope - Swazi style. As you see, they all thought it was pretty funny...
especially the girl on the left who is pointing and laughing. I think I ended up with some battle wounds from that activity.






So, I moved on to this ball relay...but we lost....












Then just resorted to rolling down the hill in the pipe. Gugu made the 1st run with me and love it! After seeing that we survived, the rest of the teachers and 'Cup workers joined the fun.







Trinity Rodgers helping me blow out my candles for my 21st birthday. She also let me borrow her lovely "Birthday Princess" tiara :)







Ashley, me, and Charlene at the top of Execution on our last day.

Getting Sick...

I have been fighting this for a weeks, but finally succumbed....and got sick. Not exactly the greatest timing going into exam week, but at least I should be better by the time school is out, right? I think the good side is that I would probably be more sad that school is ending, but pulling overnighters with a fever has a strange way of squelching that, you know?

World Malaria Day

April 25th is the first ever World Malaria Day, designed for malaria-free countries to learn about the devastating consequences of the disease and for new donors to join a global partnership against malaria.

Here are some stats from the CDC about malaria:
Malaria is a mosquito-borne disease caused by a parasite. People with malaria often experience fever, chills, and flu-like illness. Left untreated, they may develop severe complications and die.

-At the end of 2004, some 3.2 billion people lived in areas at risk of malaria transmission in 107 countries and territories.
-Between 350 and 500 million clinical episodes of malaria occur every year. (That is 958,904 - 1.3 million per day.)
-At least one million deaths occur every year due to malaria.
-About 60% of the cases of malaria worldwide and more than 80% of the malaria deaths worldwide occur in Africa south of the Sahara.
-It is the 4th leading cause of death for children under 5, killing over 2300/day.

This sometimes fatal disease can be prevented and cured. Bednets, insecticides, and antimalarial drugs are effective tools to fight malaria in areas where it is transmitted. Travelers to a malaria-risk area should avoid mosquito bites and take a preventive antimalarial drug.

My heart's cry

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me
Break my heart for what is Yours
Everything I am for Your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity

Leaders Meeting

We had Leaders Meeting tonight, lead by Pastor TJ. The past 2 years, I have had in incredible honor of working with TJ. He has taught me so much about valuing people through relationships. He has been my pastor, boss, friend, mentor, big brother, and cheerleader - and he is not afraid to give me a kick in the rear when I needed it (don't you love friends who can just be honest with you?). I am so blessed to be able to work with him and can't wait to see all that God does through him.

Tonight, he had a phenomenal message about living with ridiculous faith. He referenced 1 Sam. 17 (story of David and Goliath) and how Saul was living on the basis of reason and how David lived on the basis of faith. He challenged us to not live with the "someday" syndrome (thinking someday I'll ____....) and get to the point of (in the words of Popeye) "I can't stands it no more" and taking that holy discontent and using it as a catalyst for transformation. In verse 48, it says that "David ran quickly toward the battle line to meet him." We need to seek God's direction as to what cause is worth our life and, like David, run quickly towards the battle.

24/7 @ Bayside

This weekend, we were excited to announce that we are launching 24/7 (a ministry leadership academy) this fall. The 24/7 directors, Justin and Stefanie Dailey, were able to join us this weekend; we are so excited to have them on staff and know they are going to do amazing things for the Kingdom. Keep them in prayer during this time of transition and as they look to sell their house in B-ham and for them to find the right house in FL.

Past my bedtime...

Although I really love school, right now I am most definitely counting down the days until the semester is over. I guess you can blame it on my affinity for a semi-respectable bedtime...as in way before the 4 and 5 am average I have going on now. So, in 13 days I have 2 discussion board papers, 2 tests, 1 mock UN development plan for Kenya, and 4 finals and I'll be one happy girl ready for a nap :)

Also...Y'all should check out Hillsong United's "I Heart Revolution: With Hearts as One". Thirty songs recorded live in cities around the world, it is a little more raw than previous albums - slammin' worship!

All Access

I am so excited to have been able to attend the ARC Conference. It has been a phenomenal opportunity to connect with some amazing pastors and leadership of ARC churches all over the US. It's an honor to not only come from Bayside, but to be connected with all the other ARC churches and see that God is doing incredible things in their churches and organizations.

The conference has also been a time to recharge spiritually with some awesome worship and time to learn from pastors like Chris Hodges, Dino Rizzo, Greg Surratt, Brian Houston, Rob Ketterling, and our very own Randy Bezet. And that's not to mention the blast I have had hanging out with the Bayside staff and the wonderful Dave and Jean Ohlerking. Pastor Randy bringing it the last session!

Pastor Randy bringing it the last session!

Dust of the Earth

"Then the Lord God formed man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath or spirit of life, and man became a living being."
Genesis 2:7

Awhile back, I listened to this incredible message by Louie Giglio that was centered on this verse. Even growing up in church, I had never heard anyone approach this verse like he did, but he said that isn't it extraordinary that we are dust of the earth? That's it! Is that freeing to anybody else? We are just dust of the earth and God knows that! That is the way HE created us - He doesn't expect us to be anything but that. It's at that point where there is no opportunity for you to force or make anything possible, where all those dreams and callings are dead, unless the hand of God shows up. When you are nothing but dust of the earth, then you give God the opportunity to breathe the spirit of life into you.

"Even when there was no reason for hope, Abraham kept hoping—believing that he would become the father of many nations. For God had said to him, “That’s how many descendants you will have!” And Abraham’s faith did not weaken, even though, at about 100 years of age, he figured his body was as good as dead—and so was Sarah’s womb.
Abraham never wavered in believing God’s promise. In fact, his faith grew stronger, and in this he brought glory to God. He was fully convinced that God is able to do whatever he promises."
Romans 4:18-21

I LOVE this!! From the human perspective, Abraham knew the logic of what God had asked him to believe. He knew that this dream was TOTALLY impossible without God and he chose to trust - "fully convinced that God is able to do whatever he promises" and in that he brought glory to God.